


The First In Line

by rufferto



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Adventure, Angst, I don't think there is really any dubcon in this but i'm tagging it dub con anyway, M/M, Romance, Violence, Wincest - Freeform, dubcon, supernatural style humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-25
Updated: 2018-02-25
Packaged: 2019-03-23 19:35:55
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 26,158
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13794777
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rufferto/pseuds/rufferto
Summary: This was a fic I wrote in Sept 2007 which I posted to a collection in Livejournal and I'm moving it to Archive of our own.PREMISE: Setting is a couple of episodes into Season Two. Just after “bloodlust”. Dean struggles and cracks. Sam's broken. Lust, Pain and Anger drive Dean over the edge and he takes it out on Sam. Eventually they end up tangling with two sides of an old war they were warned to stay out of.**I wrote this long before Castiel and the angels were on the show.** :)





	The First In Line

The First in Line

Do you even know what the devil does  
He drives a man 'til he can't take no more  
I was a young man then, I was a young man then  
Spending time on the killing floor  
-Motorhead “Joy Of Labour”

It wasn’t like he hadn’t thought about it before and there were thousands of reasons why he should not be thinking about it now. Of course he’d told himself this as long as he could remember. Sam Winchester shifted uncomfortably in the motel room armchair. He was 23 years old and in his whole life he had not had a moment’s peace.  
  
“Ok, life so far.” Sam muttered to himself. He’d given up thinking about the future. What was the point when he didn’t think he’d live to see 24? He stared up at the ceiling. Where the hell was Dean? His brother was staying out later and later lately. He had a tendency to come back drunk, too. Today was likely going to be no different.  
  
He tried to help Dean deal and he knew that his brother was having a difficult time with everything. In the last year he’d cheated death twice, who wouldn’t be having difficulty with that? Sam sighed, he’d tried his best to get through to Dean but this time it might take a miracle. Since meeting Gordon, Dean was dealing with a lot of inner turmoil. The idea that he might be responsible for killing things that weren’t evil was weighing on his conscious and Sam understood. They’d been raised to kill first, ask questions later.  
  
Sam ran the fingers of his good hand through his hair. He honestly hated the inconvenience of a broken arm. It reminded him that he was human but it was still a pain in the ass. It made fighting difficult and painful. Dean would look at him from time to time and Sam just knew that he was blaming himself for it. Sam sagged in his chair, letting his head fall back on the cushion. It was almost one in the morning and Dean wasn’t back yet. He thought about calling his brother but that would seem like he was being a nursemaid or something. He was tired of getting the run around jokes and glares. I’m ok, he’d said. Dean wasn’t ok. There was no way anyone could be ok after that.  
  
Dean stumbled down the hall; the happy buzz had knocked out any sensible thought from his head. It had been a good night, he’d won some money and danced with a couple of loose women and a very attractive man. He didn’t want to go back to the motel and face Sammy’s reproachful eyes. God, if Sam only knew what he really was thinking at times. He was glad Sam’s ability was just visions because if it was anything else, he’d run so far and fast there would be fire on the street from the haste of his exit. He didn’t remember exactly when he’d begun to think of Sam differently and he didn’t care. He was going to hell anyway who cared what nasty erotic thoughts he had of his own little brother?  
  
Driven by revenge and the thoughts that Dad had placed in his head and ingrained into him it was Dean’s job to kill evil. Gordon said it was black and white, no shades of grey. If it wasn’t human, kill it. He wondered if Dad would say if it wasn’t female don’t let it fuck you too. As a kid growing up the way he had he’d learnt to take pleasure where he could get it. Sammy didn’t seem to need release the way Dean did after a hunt. It was the one thing that kept him alive and made damn sure that he didn’t act on any hidden desires.  
  
It’s not that he hated this life, really, he loved it. Dean liked the freedom. He was off the grid, no one could find him. He didn’t pay taxes or health insurance. He was not part of the system, he had his own system and that’s the way he liked it. He loved his job; it was his calling. He was a hunter and he’d never be a husband and father with a nine to five.    
  
He was very close to drunk though tonight and hadn’t had release yet. It was a bad idea to go back to the motel room but he had no choice he couldn’t hang out in the Impala all night it was –freezing-. He would take a cold shower and sleep. He would do nothing about the pain inside tonight. Hopefully he’d have more luck and find someone to stick his cock into at the next small town.  
  
He fumbled with the keys and practically fell into the room. His entrance woke up a startled Sam who stared at his brother in concern. “Dean?” He yawned. “Fuck what time is it?” He looked towards the clock.  
  
“Late.” Dean shrugged and dropped his jacket on a chair. It smelled of stale cigarette smoke and beer.  
  
Sam wrinkled his nose. “It’s cold out, I was worried.” He said, his eyes tracked Dean as his brother moved to the bathroom and splashed water on his face.  
  
‘You should be sleeping.” Dean noted. He pulled of his shirt, unbuttoned his jeans and fell into a nearby chair, his legs spread out lounge style. “What’s on TV?”  
  
“Same shit as the last motel.” Sam shrugged. “I didn’t find anything in the papers.”  
  
“No? What about online? Nothing in the area?” Dean stared at Sam.  
  
It was the kind of look that always unnerved his younger brother. It made Sam feel like Dean was mentally thinking of something else. “Nothing” Sam shook his head. “It’s a quiet week.”  
  
“Damnit I don’t want quiet.” Dean grunted. “You sure there’s nothing?”  
  
“Actually, I’m glad there’s nothing.” Sam said. “But I don’t like seeing you this way. You’re drinking too much.”  
  
The straightforward words drew a scowl from Dean. “Not that much, I know my limits, Sammy. Hunter can’t be drunk.”  
  
“You are. Dean you stink.” Sam kept wary eyes on his brother.  
  
“The bar was a dive.” He shrugged. “I am not drunk Sam, and if I were, it’d be none of your business anyway.”  
  
“The hell it would, I’m your brother and I care about you. I’m not going to let you go off halfcocked cause you’ve got a chip on your shoulder the size of Greenland.”  
  
“What the hell’s Greenland?”  
  
Sam rolled his eyes. “Dean.” He spread his hands. “You have to get it together. Talk to me.”  
  
“Aw hell not this crap again. What does it take to shut you up, Sam?”  
  
“I’ll keep asking until you get it off your chest.”  
  
“Sam, you’re pissing me off.” Dean warned. It was probably a bad idea to not immediately take a cold shower. Sam seemed to be intent on picking a fight.  
  
“Good. Then you’d at least show some emotion and deal!” Sam glared.  
  
Dean jumped to his feet and pulled Sam to his by his shirt. “I am dealing!” He shouted. “I am so fucking tired of hearing you telling me what to think. Damnit, Sam, just shut up!”  
  
“Dean…” Sam started.  
  
“I said shut up.” Dean growled. “Christ, what does it take?”  
  
The next thing Sam knew Dean’s lips were on his. What was worse, he was responding! Sam’s head reeled as he attempted to get out of his brother’s iron grip. The taste of liquor was strong, but there was something different, a flavor Sam had a feeling he could get addicted to pretty quickly. This was Dean’s unique flavor. It was his fire and essence. Sam eventually stopped struggling as Dean gripped him tightly, he couldn’t believe how quickly his body was reacting to the savage thrust of Dean’s tongue. The kiss was not like a first kiss should be. It was all raw with hunger and pain, like a wild animal who hadn’t fed in a week.  
  
Finally, Dean released his lips and panted. His green eyes were intense as he stared into Sam’s dark ones. In a clear warning tone he said. “If you don’t stop that shit, I’m going to make you regret it, Sam. That is just a taste of what I’m capable of. If you think I’ll stop at a kiss next time, think again.”  
  
Dean released his stunned brother and stalked back into the bathroom.  
  
*** 

 

Sam rubbed his sore arm. He’d chickened out and quickly got into bed shortly after Dean had kissed him not exactly wanting to see his brother’s temper turned on him again. Especially like that. He heard Dean come out of the bathroom about twenty minutes later and closed his eyes. The kiss kept playing over and over in his mind. It had touched every part of his being and he felt like Dean had ripped him open and left him bleeding. It was not that he was afraid of Dean but he had been harboring this secret guilt for so many years he couldn’t believe it was out in the open. There had been no words of comfort, no ‘”It’s ok to feel this way. It’s ok to want your own brother.” Dean had kissed him to punish him, not to give him pleasure. It had killed any thought in his head that those subtle looks had anything to do with love. Sam tensed when he felt Dean sit on the edge of his bed.  
  
“Sammy, are you awake?” Dean’s voice was a lot calmer now. It didn’t hold raw fury. Maybe it was safe to move. Sam wasn’t taking any chances, though. Dean shifted on the bed and Sam could feel his gaze. He always knew when Dean was looking at him. “Sam?” He felt Dean’s hand shake his shoulder gently.  
  
With a sigh, Sam turned over on his side and opened his eyes. His plan had been to pretend sleep until he heard Dean snore lightly. Unfortunately, it didn’t look like Dean was going to go away.

  
Dean gazed down at Sam with troubled eyes inspecting the damage. The bruise on his lip was pretty obvious. Dean compressed his mouth in a thin line.  
  
Sam was damn sure that was the only part of him hurt that Dean would see. “Yeah.” He nodded.  
  
He could tell Dean was having difficulty trying to figure out what to say but he wasn’t prepared for the fleeting look of fear in his brother’s eyes. “I’m sorry.” Dean said finally. “I was way out of line. It won’t happen again.”  
  
Dean’s hand rested on his shoulder and Sam put his hand over Dean’s, linking their fingers. “Don’t sweat it.” Sam smiled faintly. “I can be a pain in the ass.”  
  
Dean’s eyes dropped to Sam’s hand and his jaw set with a slight tremble. “There’s a rage in me, Sam.” He whispered. “I need action, I need a hunt. I can’t sit around and do nothing. It’s making me crazy.”  
  
“We’ll find something.” Sam sat up. “I’ll call Ellen; see if anything’s come up.”  
  
Dean sighed. He lifted his eyes to study Sam’s face. The silence between them stretched and he finally lowered his gaze. “Your lip bled.” He noted.  
  
Sam shrugged, “It’s nothing. Dean I’m tired. Let’s get some sleep, ok?”  
  
Dean just nodded and rose to go to his own bed. He looked back down at Sam. “Was that the first time you ever got kissed by a guy?”  
  
Sam stared up at Dean, scoffed and flushed slightly. “Of course it was!” He grunted.  
  
Dean rubbed the back of his neck. “Good. If I ever catch you kissing another guy, I’ll kill him, and then I’ll kick your ass. That’s a promise.”  
  
Sam stared at Dean, wide-eyed. What the hell did THAT mean?  
  
Dean’s eyes were dark as he looked down at Sam. His thumb traced Sam’s lower lip and he grinned. “If you want to get laid, I’m cool with you fucking some chick. But the only man you’ll ever kiss or touch is me. Is that understood? No man touches you but me, ever.”  
  
Sam gaped at Dean, one minute he was apologizing, the next he was threatening death. They had only kissed once, and he’d said it wouldn’t happen again. Aw hell, Sam was more confused now than when Dean had kissed him. “Yes, uh, sure.” Sam could only nod.  
  
Dean snorted. “Move over.”  
  
“What?”  
  
“Are you deaf? Move over.”  
  
Not wanting to add to Dean’s irritation, Sam shifted to the other side of the bed. His confusion was clear in his eyes.  
  
“No, Sam. I’m not possessed.” Dean slipped under the covers and opened up an arm. “Humor me. Don’t worry, just for tonight.”  
  
Just for tonight. Sam’s heart raced. “Ok.”  
  
He curled into his brother’s side, letting his broken arm rest on Dean’s chest. He felt Dean shift to turn out the light.  
  
A few minutes later, Dean was asleep, holding Sam.  
  
Sam yawned himself, but sleep didn’t come easy. He had never seen Dean like this before. He hadn’t slept in the same bed with Dean since he was about six. What was going on in his brother’s head? He’d never even thought about trying out his desires on another man before. He was too chicken for that. He didn’t have Dean’s ability to handle sex of any kind. Hell, lately he’d been resorting to porn. He had to admit he liked being in Dean’s arms. It felt –good-. Sam was worried though, he’d never heard anything like that from his brother before. Hell, he was pretty sure he’d seen Dean with a few guys in the past. What did it matter to Dean who Sam did or did not kiss? After all, he was very into Jo when they were at Ellen’s.  
  
He wanted it to make sense, but none of it did. If he knew for sure what Dean wanted it would make things easier, he was sure he would even be willing to give them if prodded a little. He wondered what sex with Dean would be like. Hard and fast? Rough and sweet? Long and tender? Sex with Jessica had always been sweet.  He’d been satisfied. He had no idea what it would be like with a man. He’d have to read up on it.  
  
Sam was pretty sure this subject would be easy to research.  
  
***  


It wasn’t exactly surprising that he had been able to find a great deal of information. Unfortunately none of it made him feel any easier about the subject. Dean had been gone in the morning when he woke up and Sam had spent an uncomfortable few hours on his own. He’d showered and looked up information. The problem was that all the information made him more and more nervous. Besides the fact that sex with a man sounded painful he wasn’t even sure just what was going on in his brother’s head. There was a drug store near the motel and Sam had gone out to pick up a few things, just in case. He didn’t know what to expect but he was damn certain he wasn’t going to be caught unprepared. He hid them in his bag and prepared a sand which. Dean’s note had said he’d be back in the afternoon.  
  
Sometime after lunch Sam was starting to get antsy. He’d tried Dean’s cell phone but got no answer. He’d already washed up dishes when Dean finally came in. Dean dropped a package on the table. “Stopped by the local hospital and picked up pain meds for you.” He waggled his Doctor’s ID. “These things sure come in handy. You were whimpering in your sleep.” Dean said. “How’s your arm?”  
  
“In a cast” Sam grunted, ears slightly warm from the comment about whimpering. . “Are you hungry? There’s some sandwich stuff I got from the drug store down the street. He trailed off as Dean put his sunglasses down and threw off his jacket.  
  
Dean shrugged. “Not really. I’d chuck the rest. We’re not staying. There is nothing out of the ordinary in this town, we should move on.” As usual, Dean wasn’t satisfied with just waiting to see something in the newspaper. “Besides, you know I don’t eat rabbit food.”  
  
“It is meat, Dean.” Sam said defensively as he took the pain killers. “Turkey.”  
  
“Packaged crap is what it is, Turkey is thick and has gravy and mashed potatoes, not this _sliced paper_. We’ll swing by the diner before heading out. Pack up.” Dean’s order was clear. It was time to go.  
  
Sam knew better than to argue with that tone of voice. Ok, so they weren’t going to talk about it. He hurried, knowing Dean didn’t like to be kept waiting. It didn’t’ take long to pack everything up. “Oh, I called Ellen. She says everyone has commented that it’s been quiet. She says Ash told her things are brewing but didn’t say what.”  
  
Dean nodded. He didn’t appear to like the sound of that, but there wasn’t much he could do about it. He tossed his stuff in the trunk and waited for Sam.  
  
“I’ll check us out.” Sam added his bag to the trunk, picked up the keys and headed to the motel lobby. Dean’s eyes tracked Sam sending a nervous shiver up his spine.  
  
The motel manager wasn’t there but his son was lounging on the desk. He spied Sam walking in and smiled. “It was just my day for distraction. Checking in?”  
  
“Checking out, sorry.” Sam couldn’t help but return the infectious smile from the guy.  
  
He was good looking, tall and blonde, wearing a tank top and muscular. Sam didn’t mind looking at him at all. “Too bad” He looked Sam up and down suggestively and winked. “I’d have given you a free room. I’m Steve, by the way.”  
  
Sam’s ears went warm again. He knew he was being checked out. “Sam.” It was hard not to notice the interest in Steve’s bright blue eyes. “I didn’t see you here before.”  
  
“I was out of town.” Steve said. “Ouch, that look like it hurt when it happened.” He indicated Sam’s broken arm. “You sure you don’t want to stay a few more days? I’d love to show you about. We may look small but there are plenty of nooks and crannies no one knows about.”  
Sam had never blushed before in front of anyone other than his brother but he felt his cheeks get hot. Steve’s hand had managed to lay over his as he was taking the keys. It was all the research he’d done that morning. That had to be it. Why in the world was his body reacting so quickly to a complete stranger? A guy too, until last night, he’d never even thought about it.  
  
Steve leant forward. “So tell me your story. What happened?”  
  
Sam cleared his throat and was just about to respond when Dean threw open the door.  
  
“Hey, what’s the hold up?” His brother came in and stopped in his tracks. He spotted Steve’s hand on Sam’s and it was probably a very good thing he was wearing his sunglasses because something inside him exploded. He strode over as casually as possible. “Is there a problem?”  
  
Sam indicated Dean, “My brother.” He pulled his hand away from Steve. “We gotta go, some other time, ok?”  
  
On their way out, Dean spotted a bathroom. “One minute.” He pulled a startled Sam inside. “Wash your hand.”  
  
“Huh?”  
  
“Wash it.”  
  
“Dean?”  
  
“Sam I swear to god, don’t ask me again. Wash your hand now.”  
  
“Fuck, nothing happened. I talked to him for 2 minutes.” Sam backed away.  
  
“I don’t care. Wash your damn hand now.” Dean growled. “Remember what I told you.”  
  
“Listen, I’m not five years old, Dean. You can’t order me around.” Sam rebelled, his eyes sharpening. “He touched me, for god sake. It’s not like he was kissing me. And who the hell are you to tell me what I can and cannot do?”  
  
“Sammy—“ Dean warned.  
  
Instead of continuing the argument, Sam did do exactly as told.  
  
They both walked out of the bathroom to hear an amused snort from the guy behind the counter. Dean flipped him the bird while he ushered Sam out the door. In the car, Dean glanced over at Sam. “I’m just protecting you.”  
  
Sam’s eyebrows rose, “From what? Christ, Dean. You acted like a …” The words _Jealous Ass_ hung in the air. Sam stammered on them. It was impossible. Dean had put him in the most awkward position he’d ever been in.  
  
“Forget it. I’m hungry, let’s go eat something and talk about something else. I’m not in the mood to argue, ok? Truce?” Dean offered his hand.  
  
Sam bit his lower lip, not realizing that he was causing the bruise to worsen. “Ok.” He took Dean’s hand and nodded. In spite of Dean’s smile, he knew that things were not ok in the pit of his stomach. Dean was mood swinging like crazy. There had to be something he could do to ground his brother or he had a feeling that he was going to get more than a bruise on his lip.  
  
Dean started the car and drove them to the diner.  
  
***

 

Across the table from Dean, Sam studied his brother. Dean sure was acting funny this morning, more so than usual. That whole insistence on washing his hand had Sam worried. “Dean.” Sam formed the word carefully with his lips.  
  
“Yeah?” Dean stuffed eggs into his mouth.  
  
“What’s wrong with you?” Sam said finally. ”You’re confusing the hell out of me. I don’t want to fight with you.”  
  
“What are you talking about, Sam?”  
  
“One minute, you’re my brother and I understand you, the next you’re someone else. What did I do?” Sam tried to think of the last few jobs they’d been on and if anything unusual had happened to Dean. He couldn’t put his finger on anything.  
  
Dean eyed Sam and shifted slightly. “You didn’t do anything.”  
  
Sam sighed, “Then why are you acting like this? Dean, I’m not going to deny there’s some weird shit going on between us and I’m not naïve enough to believe you don’t feel it too. You’re my brother, Dean. I’m not going to let you tear yourself to pieces because you can’t control something we both know we want and can’t do anything about.”  
  
Dean blinked several times at Sam. “You sure about that?” He finally responded.  
  
It was Sam’s turn to blink.  
  
“You sure I won’t just take what I want one of these nights, Sam? You really think you can stop me?”  
  
“You wouldn’t do that.” Sam shook his head. “I know you, Dean.”  
  
Dean shook his head. “You don’t get what’s happening, do you Sam? This is why I need the work. I need the hunt. I can’t explain it, and your psychobabble isn’t helping.”  
  
“If you’d just listen, if you’d just talk to me.” Sam implored. “Dean, I’m not afraid of you. I just want to help.”  
  
“You should be afraid of me.” Dean said sharply. “The topic of conversation should change now.”  
  
All he could do was nod. Sam didn’t know what else he –could- do. If Dean wouldn’t let him help, wouldn’t talk to him. He sighed. “Ok, ok.” He took a deep breath. “Where are we headed to?”  
  
“You’d have thought a place called Casper, Wyoming would be more interesting.” Dean commented and was about to respond further when someone turned up the tv in the diner.  
  
“Early this morning a body was discovered on route 224. We’ve never seen anything like it here in Casper. The victim is unidentifiable. His face was burnt and he had no ID. Perhaps the most unusual fact is that he was found nailed by iron spikes to the Asphalt in the middle of route 224 on the way to Soda Lake.”  
  
Dean grinned at Sam, the expression in his eyes was almost like a kid at Christmas. “Sounds like we’ll have to stick around here and check this out.”  
  
“Dean there’s nothing but oil rigs up there.” Sam thought about it what he’d learned of the area. He fiddled with his PDA. “There’s a Bozeman trail running through the sand hills. It’s not easy to access by the public.”  
  
“Boz what?” Dean blinked at Sam incredulously.  
  
“Bozeman.” Sam repeated. “Back in the old days they used it to drive oxen on these trails. They were the quickest routes. Hm. I’ve never heard of people nailed to asphalt before though. We’ll have to check it out.”  
  
“Sounds great, Cowboys and Indians.” Dean grinned, his eyes sparked with energy as he started to seriously shovel food in his haste to get into action.  
  
Sam watched him with amusement. He loved it when Dean was like this, he was more himself and easier to deal with. He thought about what his brother had said regarding the hunt. Dean really did live for it. He wondered if not having the hunt was the reason Dean had lost control of his emotions. That would explain the mood swings, but not his behavior.  
  
They got into the car and Sam thought he saw something out of the corner of his eye. A shadow cast on the ground. The shadow had six wings. He looked up to see Steve coming out of a beat-up old pickup truck. Steve gave him a cheery grin, winked and headed into the diner. His shadow was normal. Sam chalked it up to nerves.  
  
As he was flipping through the journal during the ride out to route 224 Sam gave a sharp intake of breath. “Shit.”  
  
“What?” Dean asked.  
  
“Dad mentions Soda Lake in here. He only has one sentence and a couple of bullets. He’s pasted an old newspaper clipping though.”  
  
“And?”  
  
“That prayer is from revelations Dean.”  
  
“The bible?” Dean’s eyebrows shot up.  
  
Sam cocked his head with a grim smile. “Yeah. 'Holy, holy, holy is the Lord God Almighty, who was, and is, and is to come.” Dad’s bullets say Trisagion, Fire and Iron. This article talks about a woman who was nailed by iron and her face burned. She was cleaved in two as well. Dad doesn’t say anything else. Dean, the Trisagion is the oldest prayer in Christianity. I’m willing to bet the dead dude is part of the problem. The other murder took place about….25 years ago.”  
  
“So we’ll find out what is and stop it?”  
  
“Don’t think this is up our alley Dean. Dad’s marked this with a big x. That generally means he moved on and didn’t handle the issue. Ellen and Bobby mentioned a war. I think we’re going to find something we don’t want to piss off.”  
  
“I don’t care. We’re in the middle of this and I’m going to take out whatever I can.” Dean growled, his eyes flashing dangerously. “I’m tired of being jerked on strings.”  
  
“Dean.” Sam shook his head. “No, let’s leave. I’ve got a bad feeling about this.”  
  
“Sam.” Dean warned. “I’m not backing down.”  
  
*  
  
He waited, knowing they would come. The sheer irony of it all amused him. His father would be pleased. It was time for payback. Dean Winchester wouldn’t get into heaven, one way or the other.  
  
***

  
They were quiet on the way up to the crime scene. Dean drove while Sam kept looking things up on the area. Every now and then, Sam would catch Dean looking at him and after a while it started to bug him. “Dean.” Sam said sharply. “I’m trying to think.”  
  
Dean shrugged. He looked back at the road. “And I’m trying to drive, but you keep biting your lip.”  
  
“Huh?” Sam stared at him.  
  
Dean glanced over, “You’re making the bruise worse.”  
  
Sam’s eyes narrowed. “You want to talk about my lips –now-?”  
  
“I’m just sayin’.” Dean said defensively.  
  
Up ahead, part of the road was blocked off and traffic was slowing down. There were police around and they were searching the area. Dean pulled the Impala over. “Let’s check it out. This is where the man was found isn’t it?”  
  
Sam nodded.  
  
They got out of the car and Dean picked up a couple of police badges. “Here, we’re undercover cops.” He told Sam, and then gave his brother a very broad wink.  
  
Sam stopped and glared at Dean as he walked up nonchalantly to the scene.  
  
“Hey, this is a restricted area, you shouldn’t be here.” One cop told them.  
  
“That’s ok, officer. We’re here to investigate the murder.” Dean showed the guy his badge and since it looked authentic they were let in. “Did they take the body away already?”  
  
“It’s in the ambulance. We’re searching the area to see if there are any more victims.” The cop said.  
  
“Can we see the corpse?”  
  
“Knock yourself out.” He jerked a thumb to the ambulance.  
  
Dean headed over to the ambulance while Sam crouched down to study the road. There didn’t seem to be any connection that he could immediately see. Blood was still on the asphalt.  
  
“Sam, I didn’t expect to find you here.” A familiar voice sent a shock of surprise down his spine.  
  
“Steve?” Sam rose.  
  
“Yeah.” The blonde grinned. They were about the same height. “I also work for the paper from time to time. They asked me to come out to take a look. So, you and your brother are detectives?”  
  
Sam cleared his throat, “Yeah. We investigate uh odd stuff.”  
  
“Kind of like Scully and Mulder?” Steve chuckled. “I get it. So which one of you is Scully?”  
  
Sam had no answer for that save the back of his neck suddenly becoming warm.  
  
“Ah, never mind.” Steve grinned. “Well we have something in common after all, brown eyes. I work freelance for the Casper Tribune. I have a column on paranormal activities in the area.”  
  
Dean studied the body; whatever cut it was sharp and precise. It clearly cleaved the man in two. He frowned as he lifted the cloth up. “Shit. Well, there’s something you don’t see every day.” Out of the corner of his eye he saw Sam talking with … his eyes narrowed. That Steve guy, what was –he- doing here? Dean glanced at the ambulance driver who’d let him see the body. “I’ve seen everything I need to see, thanks, man.”  
  
He headed back over to Sam and Steve who were chatting’ it up like they were old friends. Dean didn’t like the expression in his brother’s eyes. “Hey.”  
  
“Dean.” Sam said, stepping back from Steve automatically. “Did you see the body?”  
  
“Yeah, yeah.” Dean eyed Steve; there was just something he didn’t like about the guy. “What’s he like your stalker now?”  
  
Sam smacked Dean’s shoulder. “Dean. No, he’s a reporter. Sorry about my brother, Steve. He’s a little edgy these days.”  
  
“No offense taken.” Steve smiled.  
  
Dean itched to kick that smile off Steve’s perfect lips. God, no wonder Sam was into him. He was one of those gorgeous tall, blond and Brad Pitt sexy. Dean’s blood boiled. It didn’t matter; Sam belonged to _him_.  
  
Steve said, “So I guess you two will be sticking around. Want to meet up later? We can compare notes.”  
  
“No, thanks, but no.” Dean grabbed Sam’s arm. “We gotta go.”  
  
“Dean.” Sam eyed his brother. Knowing it was better than to argue Sam followed Dean back to the car. “So what…”  
  
In the Impala, Dean reached over and grabbed Sam’s arm. He dug his nails in hard. “I’ve told you who you belong to Sam.”  
  
Sam winced at the unnecessary force. “Hey… Dean. That hurts. Let go!”  
  
Dean released Sam’s arm almost immediately. “Fuck.” He shook his head.  
  
“You’re so out of control, Dean. What’s wrong with you?”  
  
“I don’t know, I don’t know.” Dean shook. “I’m cool now, I’m good.” He rubbed his face.  
  
“You’re not.” Sam sighed. “Look. I don’t want to piss you off any more than I already have. So, I’ll let it go for now, but you’re going to have to talk to me sometime soon, Dean, alright? You can’t just keep exploding like this.”  
  
“Ok.” Dean nodded, “After we’re done here.”  
  
“Alright. After we’re done here.” Sam smiled faintly.  
  
They made their way to Soda Lake. It was a haven for fisherman and bird watchers, just like any other camping ground in America. “This is yuppie hell.” Dean said with a snort. “Kids and families and shit, you sure this guy stayed here?”  
  
“Yeah, that’s what they said in the news. I’ll get us a cabin.”  
  
Dean waited in the Impala and rubbed his forehead. He’d felt a headache coming on and that usually meant he was going to get cranky. He didn’t know why he couldn’t get a grip on his emotions. It felt sometimes like he was going crazy. He was usually pretty calm and cool and kept his game face for Sam. But now, he just saw red too easily. He closed his eyes and started when Sam got back in the car.  
  
“I’ve got everything we need.” Sam said. “Keys and a map to the cabin. It’s not far from here. What?”  
  
“Nothing.” Dean shrugged and looked away.  
  
Sam let out a breath. “Just drive the car.” The last thing he wanted to do was set Dean off when there were families around. When they got to the cabin, maybe he could figure out how to calm his brother down.  
  
*  
  
“There’s only one bed?!” Dean stared at the tiny cabin with a sigh.  
  
“Best they could give me at short notice, Dude. We’ll just have to deal.” Sam shrugged as he put a bag of food away in the fridge. “It’s kinda cozy, there’s a fire.”  
  
Dean rolled his eyes. “At least there’s a shower. These places aren’t half bad.”  
  
Outside they could hear children playing and screaming.  
  
Dean sighed. “Give me a motel room any day.”  
  
Sam chuckled and spread the map of the lake out on the table. “So. Here are all the cabins in the area, I asked the receptionist and she did tell me where he was staying. They have it all taped off. We can get in there later tonight.” He glanced out at the lake. “We’ve got four hours to kill before sundown.”  
  
Dean’s eyes hooded as he looked at Sam.  
  
Sam pulled off his shirt and tossed it. He dug into his bag. “Ah, I thought I packed them.”  
  
“Still had what?”  
  
“Trunks.”  
  
“You’re going swimming?” Dean stared.  
  
“Well, yeah, it’s a lake and fucking hot out.” Sam noted. “You coming?”  
  
“Alright, whatever, but if I get leeches I’m going to kick your ass.”  
  
Sam laughed, pleased to see Dean’s mood change at least to his usual self. Whatever it took, he was going to make sure Dean stayed in a good mood tonight.  
  
“Aren’t you not supposed to get your cast wet?”  
  
Sam pulled out some duct tape and a plastic bag. “I didn’t get into Stanford on my good looks, Dean.”  
  
***

  
Swimming had been both refreshing and painful. Surrounded by yuppies and their kids was not Dean’s idea of fun. After a while, Dean had left Sam to himself and gone back into the cabin. He truly hated crowds. He grabbed a beer and stretched out on one of the cabin deck chairs while he watched Sam down by the dock. He understood of course, why they had to wait until after dark. There was just too much collateral damage around them.  
  
Contentment didn’t last long though. He fidgeted in the chair. It was truly a hot day and even though there was a breeze, Dean’s skin was warm. He’d put his jeans back on, not being one to wear shorts, shorts were for wusses. It was coming close to eight and the crowd of people milling about down by the lake were thinning out. Children had supper time and parents were tired. In about an hour, the sun would go down.  
  
Sam came back to the cabin looking thoroughly pleased. “That’ was a nice break.” He told Dean as he flopped down in the second lawn chair.  
  
“You fit in so well into yuppie world, it scares me.” Dean noted.  
  
“Shut up.” Sam glared.  
  
“No, seriously, you have a knack for it I never did. Kids, relationships. “Dean shrugged.  
  
“You’re better with kids than I am Dean.” Sam pointed out.  
  
Dean drank his beer and ignored that response. “Go put something on. I’m tired of watching people stare at you.”  
  
“Dean, it’s hot, and you’re half naked yourself.” Sam snapped.  
  
“Sammy...” Dean warned.  
  
“I’m not taking this from you anymore, Dean. So either you do what you’re going to do or shut up.” Sam scowled. He stayed where he was. “You’re not going to hurt me; you aren’t capable of hurting me, Dean. You’re just pissed at the world right now and using whatever fucked up emotion in side of you as an excuse.”  
  
“Shut up, Sammy.” Dean grunted.  
  
“Or what?” Sam smirked. He knew he was pushing it. He also knew he could take Dean if he needed to in a fight. He wasn’t weak by any means even with a broken arm. He’d also been thinking that maybe one way of getting a handle on the problems Dean was having was a full out confrontation.  
  
Dean’s growl was from deep in the pit of his stomach. He jumped to his feet and stalked to the cabin door. “Sam.” He said sharply, the word a crack of a whip. “Inside, now.”  
  
For a moment, Sam thought about not obeying Dean. Instead, he rose and entered the cabin. He thought it was better than yelling at each other out on the cabin deck within ear shot of unsuspecting families. “Alright, Dean. I’m inside.” He turned to his brother.  
  
Dean shut the cabin door and stared at Sam. His gaze slid over Sam’s form, bare except for the swim trunks. He strode over to his brother and punched him, knocking Sam to the floor. “I told you to get dressed.”  
  
Sam held his jaw, stunned. “Dean?”  
  
Dean’s fists were clenched as he stood over Sam. He shook with anger as he glared down at Sam.  
  
There had to be a way to calm down Dean, Sam had never seen him like this before. Dean had never tried to hurt him and he certainly hadn’t ever looked the way he looked now. Sam could only think of one thing to do to calm Dean down. He got to his knees. “Dean.” He said softly. “Dean, I’m sorry. It won’t happen again.”  
  
Dean stepped closer to Sam, “It had better not.”  
  
“Let me make it up to you.” Sam suggested as he cleared his throat. His face flushed slightly as he thought about what he was going to do.  
  
Dean was now close enough to touch. The rage burned through him, electrifying every sense. “And how would you do that?”  
  
Sam’s fingers hooked into one of Dean’s pockets. “Let me try.”  
  
Dean’s brows furrowed, but he didn’t pull away. Instead, he nodded, his eyes fixed on Sam.  
  
Sam had no idea what he was doing at all. He just knew that this might be the only way to get his brother to calm down. His fingers fumbled with the button of Dean’s jeans, every nerve reacting to the reality of what he was about to do. Sam cursed his broken arm; it would make things so much easier without that problem. He took a deep breath and unzipped his brother’s jeans.  
  
He forced himself to watch as the semi rigid cock was freed from confinement. Dean stepped out of his jeans to give himself free movement. He should be repulsed by it. In the back of his mind he knew how wrong this was but his body had other ideas. Dean was big, not huge, but big enough. Sam thought about what he read and his spine tingled. He felt heat pooling in his groin and swallowed.  
  
He lifted his eyes to Dean who still stared down at him. There was something unreadable in that expression, something foreign. Dean was struggling within, he could tell. He wished he knew what to say. “I want to do this, Dean.” He assured his brother. He received only a nod in response. Dean moved his hand to thread his fingers through Sam’s hair. It was a tentative touch; Sam could feel uncertainty that matched his own and something more. Perhaps fear, he wasn’t sure.  
  
Sam turned his attention back to the aroused cock. This was the point of no return. If he did this, their relationship would change forever. They hadn’t talked this out; they hadn’t even looked into what was going on and what was pushing Dean. “Dean.” Sam said softly as he looked up once more.  
  
Dean nodded and swallowed himself. “I’m ok, Sam. You don’t have to do anything.” He was holding on to sanity and control by a thread. Every part of him was screaming to take what was offered. “You don’t.”  
  
Sam turned to kiss the palm of his brother’s hand tentatively. “I know I don’t have to, Dean. I want to.”  
  
“Do you even know how?” Dean raised an amused eyebrow. It was the first sign of Dean’s temper dissipating He teased the ridge of Sam’s ear with his thumb.  
  
“No, but I’ve done some reading.” Sam grinned sheepishly. He reached up and ran two fingers down the length of Dean’s cock which almost immediately leapt to attention.  
  
“Jesus.” Dean grunted.  
  
Sam took a few breaths as he watched Dean’s cock twitch under his fingers. It was fascinating and beautiful. He cleared his throat. “You’re big, Dean. What eight? Eight and a half?”  
  
“I never actually measured it.” Dean smirked. “Are you going to just stare and take notes?”  
  
Sam responded by dragging his tongue down the length and up again. The moan that resulted spurred him on. He grinned and glanced up. “Is this good? I’m a fast learner.” He grinned.  
  
“I never…” Dean began then he cried out. Sam had taken the head of his cock into his mouth and the sensation caused his legs to buckle slightly. Dean held Sam’s shoulders, swearing.  
  
It was difficult at first to figure out how to breathe with something that big sticking down your throat. Sam grunted when he felt Dean try to thrust into him. He was finding it difficult enough to breathe. He pulled off his brother’s leaking cock. “Stop it, Dean. I can’t breathe when you do that.” He told Dean sharply.  
  
“Relax your throat and stop being a girl.” Dean responded. “Breathe through your nose.”  
  
“You’ve done this?”  
  
“Yeah.”  
  
“Who?!?” Sam was hardly surprised and didn’t like the feeling of annoyance that resulted.  
  
“It doesn’t matter. Just relax your throat.” Dean rasped.  
  
Sam nodded; he took Dean’s cock between his lips again with a little less urgency. He did as instructed, but still found it hard to manage breathing and sucking at the same time. It did not seem that Dean minded, however, given the sounds his brother was making. Sam smiled at those sounds; they reminded him of why he was doing this.  
  
It wasn’t just because he wanted to calm down his brother; Sam wasn’t naïve enough to think that. There had always been something unspoken between them but Dean had never said anything or acted on it. Sam had never brought it up. They had gone through childhood and had their fair share of girlfriends and lovers. Dean had never taken it a step further. Sam was fairly sure this had something to do with their Dad’s death. While John was alive, there was no way Dean would ever have risked showing his true feelings. Somehow that control had snapped. Sam had always buried his desire. He’d buried it so far and deep that he’d forgotten about it.  
  
Dean’s actions lately had brought all of it back. He remembered it now. The suppressed need, the way he’d find any excuse to sleep in Dean’s bed growing up. He remembered also the argument between John and Dean. One he’d forgotten.  
  
“Don’t think I don’t see the way you look at him.” Both Dean and John had thought he wasn’t home, thought he was out at the library. He remembered seeing John hit Dean and his brother fall to the floor.  
  
“Nothing will ever happen, Dad. I swear it.” Dean had promised. “Nothing.”  
  
It was only now that Sam realized that conversation had been about him. He’d been nineteen and had already decided to go to college.  
  
Now, his brother’s cock filled his mouth, stiff and relentless. He had gotten used to the sensation and learned how to breathe. He glanced up to see his brother’s flushed face and gasping breaths. Dean was close to coming. “Sammy…Sammy.” He whimpered.  
  
*That’s it… that’s it Dean.* Sam thought to himself, *let it go.*  
  
Without warning Dean’s warm seed exploded into his mouth and Sam gagged for breath. He had to pull off and try to wipe his mouth. Dean wouldn’t let him. His brother dragged Sam to his feet and kissed him. It was a hard and desperate, teeth, passion, and need. There was nothing romantic when Dean shoved him up against the wall and attacked his lips. Their hands were everywhere, touching muscles and warm heat on smooth skin.  
  
A dam had broken, and there was no turning back this time.  
  
*  
  
Outside as the sun set, he smiled. Dean Winchester was easy to manipulate. It was just icing on the cake that Sam wanted Dean just as much. He didn’t expect the footfall that followed or the flap of wings.  
  
“You don’t know the power of this family do you?”  
  
“You aren’t supposed to interfere in human affairs.”  
  
“Neither are you.”  
  
“Do you really think you can save Dean Winchester from his fate?”  
  
“You have your job, I have mine.”  
  
“He belongs with us, he is ours!”  
  
“We’ll see about that.”  
  
If anyone had been watching the exchange they would only see blood, and a shadow of six dark wings. The curved blade came down without a swipe that sliced the man in two. His body was dragged into the trees.  
  
***  


Dean’s lips were everywhere. Sam could hardly breathe for the intoxication that washed over him. He was drowning in passion, unable to think. All he wanted to do was touch and kiss and lick and wind himself around his lover any way he possibly could. It was desperation that drove them, pent up need and frustration. “I want you.” Dean whispered, licking the bottom of his ear. “God, I want you.”  
  
“Maybe we should …” Sam gasped for breath. Dean silenced him with another kiss, savage and unforgiving.  
  
“You’re mine, Sammy.” Dean let their lips part and stared into Sam’s eyes.  
  
Sam had to catch his breath, he panted, his good hand clutching Dean’s shoulder. Emotion and confusion that was pent up over the years was raging inside him. Dean’s hands weren’t being gentle. “D-Dean.” He panted. “Dean, what is this?” He stared into Dean’s heated eyes. “What’s going on with us?”  
  
“It doesn’t matter, Sam. I’m taking what I want.” Dean said, his eyes glinting. “You’ve been dangled before me for so long I can no longer stand it anymore. You want it too. Don’t think I don’t see how you stare at me when you think I’m not looking. You want me to fuck you.” Dean licked up and down Sam’s neck. “You want me to slam you into the mattress until nothing else matters but the sound of my cock slipping in and out.”  
  
“Dean…” Sam whimpered. He was in over his head and he knew it. He’d started this fire and he didn’t know how to put it out. He’d thought sucking Dean might buy him a little time and might calm his brother down. Apparently not, Sam shook his head. “Dean, no. Stop. Ok? We’re not doing that.” Not yet, anyway. Yeah, he was prepared, but not like this.  
  
“Are you teasing me, Sammy?” Dean frowned as he pulled away from his brother. His eyebrows knit together as he glared at Sam. He turned away and looked for his jeans. “I should have known you didn’t have the balls to go through with this. You think I’m not good enough for you? Is that it? I bet you’ve let hundreds of guys fuck you in Stanford? You sure did fool me, Sammy. For a moment there, I thought you were new at this.”  
  
“That’s not true, Dean. You’re the first guy ever, I swear.” Sam rubbed his bruised jaw as he stared at Dean.  
  
“Put some clothes on.” Dean ordered sharply. “We’ve got work to do here, and you’re distracting me.”  
  
So it was his fault now? Sam opened his mouth to speak and then closed it. There was no reasoning with Dean apparently. He sighed, grabbed some clothes and headed into the bathroom to change. He leant on the countertop and stared at himself in the mirror. He looked like hell. His jaw was swollen from where Dean had punched him and his lips were bruised and there were bite marks all down his neck. He looked like he’d been attacked rather than kissed.  
  
He washed his face with some cool water and took a pain killer. He took a moment to brush his teeth as well. He knew he was going to be sore in the morning. Once he was dressed and felt a little more human he ran a comb through his hair and walked out to face Dean.  
  
Dean was leaning against the doorway, fully clothed himself. “So are we going to check out the guy’s cabin?” It was a peace offering.  
  
Sam could only glare. He looked like he’d been having a fight with a brick wall and that was all Dean could say? He released a breath and grunted. “Yeah, sure.”  
  
“You’re not going to be a girl about this are you?” Dean glanced at Sam out of the corner of his eye.  
  
Sam just shrugged. “We’ve got a job to do, let’s do it. We can discuss this later.”  
  
Dean retrieved his shotgun and tossed a gun to Sam. Their personal issues were always secondary to the hunt and they both knew it.  
  
Outside, Sam felt a little better. In close confinement with Dean he felt a lot more vulnerable than when they were hunting. His brother may be a lot of things, but he never let anything come between him and the job. Sam on the other hand was more hesitant to kill than Dean. He knew that these things were evil, but sometimes they weren’t. Sometimes, you had to give the benefit of the doubt.  
  
He checked the map with his flashlight. It wasn’t that far from the cabin they were staying at but it would be a bad idea to get lost especially with Dean in the mood he was in.  
  
Sam put all of his emotions aside as they moved fast. He simply kept his eyes and ears open. About twenty minutes later they arrived to a cluster of cabins that were closer to the main road.  
  
Out of the corner of his eye, Dean saw something move way too fast to be human, not to mention the fact that it looked like it was flying. He scowled. “Something’s following us.” He hissed at Sam.  
  
Sam scowled as he peered at the trees. He didn’t like the sound of that. Then from out of nowhere, something dark and black swooped down out of the sky. It hit Dean, long claw like fingers scraping into his chest and snatched Sam by the collar. Dean was on his knees, doubled over in pain as Sam felt himself lifted off of the ground. He fumbled for his gun and shot three times.

  
The thing screeched and dropped Sam. Unfortunately for Sam he was already about twenty feet up in the air when the thing did drop him.  
  
“Sam!” Dean shouted when he saw his brother plummeting to the ground. He pulled himself to his feet and rushed to break Sam’s fall.  
  
Whatever it was, swooped back down and grabbed Sam again, this time by his broken arm. Sam yelled in pain. He forced himself to look at the clawed foot that had him. It looked almost like elongated toes.  
  
“Sammy!” Dean tried to aim his gun but it was too dark out and the creature was fast. He couldn’t risk hurting Sam. He cringed at the searing pain that ripped through his body.  
  
“Easy.” A strangely familiar voice came from behind him.  
  
Dean whipped around and held his gun on the tall shadow.  
  
“If you want to save your brother I suggest you put the gun down, Dean.”  
  
Dean glared at the shadowy figure. “Show yourself.” He ground out.  
  
Steve stepped out into the shadows, his eyes pitch black. “Put the gun down Dean, we need to talk.”  
  
“I don’t talk to demon scum.” Dean ground out.  
  
“Just like your old man. You’ll cooperate though, if you want Sam back.” Steve kept his hands where Dean could see them.  
  
*  
  
The pain was making Sam dizzy. When he tried to struggle, the second clawed foot knocked him with a punch. Sam felt his head spin. They were approaching a more rocky area and the creature swooped downwards to what looked like a cave. It dropped Sam suddenly. Sam groaned as he hit the floor of the cave entrance. He tried to struggle to his feet but the thing with six wings came at him again and laid several heavy punches. Sam lay on his back, stunned and in pain.  
  
He forced his eyes open to see the creature as it walked into the moonlight. Yes, walked. Sam’s mouth opened. It was beautiful. He was as beautiful as he was dark. Tall and regal he wore dark scaled armor stained with blood, six wings fluttered and folded. His hair was down to his waist, black as pitch. His eyes were glacial hard and glittered like diamonds.  
  
“What are you?” Sam choked out; worried at the blood he could feel pooling in his lower lip. He spat it out.  
  
“I was a servant once.” The black creature stalked forward. “Do you believe in angels, Sam Winchester?” The thing sneered.  
  
Sam could only nod. He struggled as the thing lifted him to his feet.  
  
“Good.” It smiled. “You’re going to need one when I’m done with you.”  
  
Another punch and Sam was out cold.  
  
*  
  
Dean kept his gun fixed on Steve. “What the –fuck- was that.” He ground out.  
  
“Why don’t you let me tend to your wound, and we’ll talk about it?” Steve suggested.  
  
“Touch me and you’ll lose at least five digits. I –knew- you were up to something.” Dean grunted.  
  
“You have a knack for that, you and your father.” Steve smirked. “Easy, I’m on your side on this one.”  
  
“The hell you are.” Dean refused to keep the gun off of Steve.  
  
“That my friend was a problem.”  
  
“No shit.” Dean growled, he then snorted,.  “I can’t believe I’m talking to a fucking Demon. What the hell did it do to with my brother?”  
  
“My guess is it’s going to use Sam as a bargaining chip.”  
  
“What?”  
  
“To get back into heaven or whatever is up there, anyway. It used to be an Archangel, or so Dad tells me.”  
  
Dean stared. “You’re screwing with me. There’s no such thing as Angels. Wait a minute. Son of a bitch, you’re one of his kids aren’t you?”  
  
“Correct.”  
  
“I’m going to totally waste your ass when we’re done here.” Dean snarled.  
  
Steve rolled his eyes. “I’d heard you were a hothead, but Meg was right. You’re cute when you’re angry.” He winked, “Now, you’ve got two choices. Work with me, get Sam back. Or let that self-righteous motherfucker serve your brother up in order to get off this craphole you call reality. The main reason you want to work with me, Dean, is that there’s more than one of them out there. I’ve got two of them.”  
  
“Why would you help me?” Dean glared.  
  
“We want Sam back too. He’s no good to us nailed to a cross, Dean and we know what Daddy dearest told you before he checked in down below.”  
  
Dean growled. Inwardly, he recoiled at the idea of working with Demons. Especially this one, and especially when he was out of options. He exhaled sharply and lowered his gun. “Fine” he grunted. “But I’m still wasting your ass when we’re done here.”  
  
Steve smirked. Working with Dean Winchester was going to be interesting.  
  
He pulled off his shirt so Steve could take a look at the damage. “What the hell kind of name is Michael for a monster anyway?”  
  
“Do you know what a Seraphim is?”  
  
“Yeah, some kind of angel Sammy was on about it.”  
  
“This is a Seraphim that committed sins against God.”  
  
“Angels aren’t real.” Dean smirked. “How dumb do you think I am?”  
  
“Devils are real, what makes you think Angel’s aren’t?”  
  
“I believe in what I can see, and what I saw was evil, Steve. Just like all you sonsofbitches.”  
  
Steve smirked. “We’ve been tracking Michael for years. I’ve a few brothers in the area. Michael killed them and a sister many years ago. In fact, I just lost another one about an hour or so ago. Michael tore him apart. We were meeting up here and were going to try and take you and Sam out before Michael got to you.”  
  
“You fucked up that job.” Dean smirked. “They don’t pay you very well down there do they?”  
  
“On the contrary.” Steve chuckled. “Try it sometime, you might like it better.”  
  
“No thanks. I’ll keep my soul.”  
  
“For now.” Steve poured water on a rag to wash Dean’s wounds.  
  
Of course he wasn’t going to tell Dean that Michael was luring him in. Michael’s real target was Dean. He figured if he could get Dean’s cooperation, he’d be able to take Michael out and score points with Dad for saving Sam’s ass. Michael planned on using the Winchesters to get back into good graces with the powers above.  
  
It was Steve’s job to keep Dean on the dark path and Sam alive.  Steve had been waiting for this day to come. Out of the original seven fallen, only he and Michael were left. What Michael failed to realize was that there was only one place to be in this war and that was at father's side.  
  
The first step would be to get Dean to kill Michael.  
  
Things would work out nicely if the Winchesters cooperated.  
  
***

Steve knew this day was going to come. Of the original seven fallen he and Michael had always been at odds. Steven knew there was no other place for him than at his father’s side. Too much had been done, and there was too much to do. Michael had chosen to try and champion justice but only ended up shedding innocent blood. Steve had chosen a different path, the path of power. It had been hard to turn against his brother, but there was no stopping it. Over the centuries they had fought, Steven becoming darker and Michael becoming harder to find in the shadows. They were the eldest, twins and yet as different as night and day. Being the eldest they had the most power. It was just hard for Steven to accept that he couldn’t kill Michael. To kill an angel, even a fallen angel as powerful as Michael, a sacrifice would have to be made.  
  
He was not bad at being a medic; it was one of the many jobs he’d held over the years. “You know.” He told Dean. “We’re not much different, you and I.”  
  
“The way I see it, well, you’re a demon and I’m a human, and you’re trying to take over my world. This generally tends to piss me off, which results in you and yours biting the dust, so I can’t see how we’re alike.” Dean flinched. “That hurts.”  
  
Steven smirked. “No pain, no gain.” He tightened the bandage. “That will help any more blood loss. You’ll be fine, your brother on the other hand. Not sure how many pieces we’re going to find him in.”  
  
“Then let’s get a move on.” Dean rose.  
  
“Now hold on a minute.” Seven protested. “You have no idea what you’re going into do you?”  
  
Dean shrugged. “If you don’t mind, I’d just as soon we spent as little time talking as possible.”  
  
“Typical human” Steve scoffed. “I’ve done some things in my time, but you and Sam, it’s better than cable.”  
  
Dean narrowed his eyes at Steve, “Just what the hell do you mean by that.”  
  
He chuckled, “You are going to seriously injure him one of these days, Dean. You know that? And I don’t mean physically. You could fuck Sam senseless and beat him to a pulp and you know what the saddest thing in the world is?”  
  
Dean clenched a fist.  
  
“I didn’t think you did. Well, the fact is. He loves you. Father can’t stand it. You’re the only thing standing in the way of him getting Sam is that Sam is completely head over heels in love with your sorry ass. He has been for years, Dean. You’re the only thing standing between him and eternal damnation. But do you want to know the funny part? Now here’s the kicker.”  
  
Dean cracked his knuckles, eyes boring into Steve’s. If hatred could kill, the demon would be in a lot of different pieces right now.  
  
“You’re damned, Dean. So to follow you, he has to come to us.”  
  
“How do you figure I’m damned?”  
  
“You remembers Meg, don’t you Dean? She was an innocent girl and you killed her. You know there were others too.” Steve handed Dean his shirt.  
  
Dean stared at Steve. He knew the man, well thing, was right. There probably were other innocents he had killed. How many? How many? And he had just hurt Sam too, his beloved brother, the only reason he had for living. He couldn’t trust this thing. He had to think he had to make sure that Sam was ok, that he was alive. Dean was sure that he would know if Sam was dead. That was all that mattered. He didn’t care what happened to him as long as Sam was ok. He’d make it up to Sam. He’d lost control but it would never happen again. “You don’t know shit.” Dean smirked.  
  
“You hurt him, didn’t you? Just now in the cabin? I saw his face. You would have hurt him more if he had let you. You would have taken him, fucked him hard even though he wasn’t ready for it. You just would have taken what you wanted because that’s what your Daddy does, he takes and takes and kills until there’s nothing left. But you know what, we got him, Dean. And we’ll get you too; you’ll be one big happy family of pain. That’s your destiny, that’s your future.”  
  
“You’re a son of a bitch and you don’t know anything. You may call yourselves after angels. Hell you could call yourself friggin Christ himself and I still would think you’re a wacko demented asshole who crawled out from chaos to ruin my day. If you don’t shut up about my family, this truce ends right here, right now and I salt your ass.” Dean was livid. He never held any faith in god or a higher power. As far as he was concerned there was evil he had to destroy and nothing was looking out for him.  
  
“Alright, Dean” Steve smirked. “Alright, but just remember what I said when the time comes.”  
  
*  
  
Sam could not remember being in more pain than he was now. He cradled his arm as he curled up in the cave entrance. Michael was standing in front. Each time he’d tried to move or escape, he’d been thrown back against the wall. He’d also tried talking to the creature that simply looked at him in distain. In its human form, the creature was the most beautiful man he’d ever seen. He was perfection down to the last detail. It was not that Sam was interested; it was only Sam’s natural desire to study and learn. It was obviously some kind of demon. For some reason it hadn’t killed him yet. What was it waiting for?  
  
Michael looked back at Sam, a sneer on his lips. “Filthy mongrel, stay where you are or I will break your other arm.” Its voice sounded like a chorus of echoes and grated on Sam’s every nerve.  
  
“What do you want with me?” Sam rasped as he wiped blood from his mouth.  
  
“Redemption” Michael responded.  
  
*  
  
Dean hated walking in the wild. He hated nature, give him some Asphalt and cement any day of the week and he’d be happy. What he hated more was the fact that he was walking through the wilderness with his sworn enemy to rescue his brother. Not to mention the fact that Steven said his brother had been kidnapped by an ex Angel. Dean didn’t believe it, Demons were demons and they were all scum trying to destroy anything worth living for. He would never believe that this Michael had been a tool of God.  
  
“Thinking about what Michael could be doing to Sam?” Steven’s voice brought Dean out of his thoughts. “He’s been known to take his pleasures with men, you know.”  
  
The thought had not occurred to Dean that Sam could be in for more than just physical danger. He set his jaw and refused to take the bait. Deep down, rage boiled again.  
  
“And Sam, well. Your brother is a fine piece of work. The things I could think of to do with those firm long legs.” Steve wondered what it would take to break Dean and cut through that invisible armor of his. “Once we get him back where he belongs, I’m sure he’ll be an interesting diversion.”  
  
Dean focused on the trail they were following. He didn’t want to think about anyone touching Sam. He had to keep his cool. “Sam belongs with me.”  
  
“Sam belongs with his family, Dean.” Steve gave a twisted smirk. “Not with a brother who can’t control his lust.”  
  
*  
  
Michael noticed Sam coughing. He dropped a gourd of water by his captive. “It’s not time for you to die, yet.”  
  
Sam snatched the gourd and drank.  
  
“You should be thankful.” Michael said. “God sees the truth in all things. Your death now will ensure your freedom from the one who wants your family.”  
“What about Dean?” Sam coughed.  
  
“He’s already damned. There is nothing you can do to stop that.”  
  
“That’s not true.” Sam growled. “My brother fights evil on a daily basis.”  
  
“Your brother hates and hatred is a sin, your brother lusts, and lust is a sin.”  
  
“There is another sin, and that is killing. If you kill me now, why do you believe that will redeem you?”  
  
“Your destiny will ensure my reward.”  
  
*  
  
Dean saw the cave first. Sam was in the mouth of the cave, he was fairly sure it looked like his brother was alive and in a lot of pain. On the way, Steve had coached him on Michael’s weaknesses. He wasn’t planning on killing Michael, only incapacitating the body long enough to get to Sam. Sam had been right from the get go, this was way out of their league.  
  
Steve pulled a pair of knives from his boot. “Here.” He gave one to Dean.  
  
“What’s this?”  
  
“It will hurt Michael. It’s the got the blood of a recently slain innocent child on it.” Steve said with a shrug. “If you stick this in his heart, it will incapacitate him.”  
  
“I hate working with Demons.” Dean grumbled as he took the dagger. “Thanks for the tip.”  
  
“Every demon has its weakness, Dean.” Steve said. “This just happens to be Michael’s.”  
  
“That’s sick. I hope you didn’t kill the kid.”  
  
“Of course I did.”  
  
“And you call me a murder.” Dean assessed the dagger. It was a good piece of information to share with Bobby later. He was pretty sure Bobby knew about it, but just knowing that every demon had a secret weakness was comforting. It could be something they could use in the future.  
  
*  
  
While Steve distracted Michael, Dean was at Sam’s side and checking to make sure he was still alive. “Sammy, Sammy. Speak to me.” He patted Sam’s face gently.  


“Dean.” Sam rasped.  
  
“Alright, sit tight. Don’t go anywhere.”  
  
Sam smirked.  
  
Dean watched the two Demons fight and wondered if it would be a better idea to just grab Sam and run. After all, how did he know Steve would let them go? It would of course mean double crossing a demon that was already pissed at him. He already had an idea of where they were going to go.  
  
Steve and Michael were really kicking each other’s ass and when Sam groaned Dean sighed. “I’m getting you out of here. Tweedle dee and Tweedle dumbass are busy duking it out. Can you stand?”  
  
“Yeah, I think so.” Sam staggered to his feet and clutched Dean’s shoulders. “You’re not going to fight?’  
  
“You’re more important to me, Sam.” Dean said softly. “They can wait.”  
  
The words filled Sam’s heart with warmth as he looked up at Dean. “Really?”  
  
“Come on; don’t make this a chick flick moment. We’re not free and clear yet.” He slung one of Sam’s long arms over his shoulder. “You know, next time I don’t listen to you, knock me out?’  
  
Sam laughed shortly. “Just get us out of here.”  
  
He shuddered as he heard the screeching creatures fighting behind them. “Dean?”  
  
Dean was in the middle of navigating their way down the hill and only half paying attention. “What?”  
  
“I love you.” Sam said softly.  
  
Dean looked up at Sam. “Well talk when I get you someplace safe.” He promised. In his gut, the confession didn’t settle right. He’d treated Sam horribly. He didn’t deserve love. Like Steve said, he was already damned.  
  
***

 

Dean glanced over at Sam who was curled up in the car. He had to get Sam to a hospital. It was times like these he really hated that shape shifter. Instead they only had one place to go and that was to Bobby. Bobby at least could take Sam to the hospital and have him checked out. He cursed under his breathe when he heard Sam coughing and saw him wipe blood from his mouth. Shit. This was all his fault. He nudged the water bottle to his exhausted brother. “Here, drink, Sammy.”  
  
He was driving as fast as he could without chance of being pulled over. He’d been driving for the last six hours. He was working now on adrenalin alone. He was so worried about Sam. He knew that his brother was going to pull through, but the way he was curled up and the look of pain in his eyes. They hadn’t been able to talk. Dean was concentrating on the road and making sure they didn’t get into an accident. He knew they were in trouble. Double crossing a demon was never a good thing to do but all he cared about was getting Sammy to safety.  
  
Sam shook his head and turned away from Dean. “No, lemme alone.” He mumbled as he cradled his arm. “My throat hurts.”  
  
“Goddamit, Sam, drink.” Dean said sharply. “I know it hurts. We’re an hour and a half from Bobby’s. You just gotta keep conscious until then. Come on.”  
  
Sam lifted his eyes to Dean. “What’s the point?” He asked.  
  
“What the fuck do you mean what’s the point? You are. The point is, you need it.” Dean nearly shouted.  
  
Sam sighed and took the water. “You haven’t said anything.”  
  
“I’m driving the car at 90 miles an hour. I’m concentrating on the damn road.”  
  
“I need to know, Dean.’ Sam swallowed.  
  
“Now? No, not until I’ve got you settled. Sammy, I just can’t concentrate on it right now. I’ll talk to you about it ok? It’s going to be alright. I promise.”  
  
“Do you love me, Dean?”  
  
“Shit. You know I do.”  
  
“I mean, do you love me?” Sam’s eyes caught Dean’s for a moment. “I just want to know, Dean.”  
  
“Sammy.” Dean exhaled. “Alright, I do. Ok? I don’t know what happened back there. I don’t know why I was acting the way I did. I hurt you, and I wish to god I hadn’t. I couldn’t control it. That’s why it can’t happen again. Do you understand, Sam? I don’t care how much we want it, it can’t happen again. I won’t risk hurting you. I love you too much for that.”  
  
“What if I don’t care?” Sam whispered. He stared at Dean balefully, dark eyes shimmering slightly. “I’ll take you anyway I can have you, Dean.”  
  
“I don’t want it to be like that. I’m sorry, Sam.” Dean was sure of it now. “When I think of what I did, I can only imagine what I’m capable of if all the right buttons are pushed. Sammy, something wasn’t right back there. It didn’t feel real. You know? I wanted it, hell, yes. I want you. But until I figure out just what is going on, no. Nothing is happening between us. You’ve got to be with me on this, Sammy. Please. It’s for your own good.”  
  
There was no use arguing and Sam knew it.  
  
That didn’t stop him from shooting Dean a glare. “What does everything have to be your way, Dean?”  
  
“I’m the eldest.” Dean smirked. “I get perks that way.”  
  
Sam snorted.  
  
“Are we cool, Sammy?” Dean asked softly. “Hm?”  
  
Sam had to think for a few moments but he already knew the answer. In spite of everything, Dean was right. They had to know what was going on with Dean. Bobby would be able to help if they could explain it. “We’re cool.” Sam nodded, he managed a warm smile.  
  
Dean smiled back in relief. Sam wasn’t going to push the issue. He vowed he would work this out. It just had to be ok. He couldn’t trust himself right now. The rage had come too quickly.  
  
*  
  
They pulled up in front of Bobby’s an hour later. Sam was in and out of consciousness which worried the hell out of Dean. He helped Sam out of the car and they stumbled to Bobby’s door.  
  
He was home, not that it was a surprise, Bobby didn’t get out much. “Boys, shit. What happened?” He immediately took hold of Sam and helped Dean move him to a couch.  
  
“Had a run in with a couple of demons.” Dean explained. “Did you know Demons can fly?”  
  
“Demons can’t fly, Dean.” Bobby smirked. “Not here, anyway, are you sure it was a demon.”  
  
“’wasn’t always a demon.” Sam slurred. To ease the pain Dean had given him quite a bit of liquor during the car ride in the last hour.  
  
“Where were you?”  
  
“Casper, Wyoming.”  
  
“Jesus H Christ.” Bobby grunted as he opened a trunk for medical supplies. “You found Michael, didn’t you?”  
  
“You know him?” Dean propped up a couple of pillows under Sam’s head. Sam had clutched his shirt and wouldn’t let Dean get any further away. He rubbed his face against Dean’s arm, causing his brother to clear his throat. “Sammy…” he hissed, glad that Bobby’s back was turned. Sam pouted at him. “Michael’s not all we found. I kinda uh, got mixed up with one of the yellow eyed demon’s kids.”  
  
“Huh.” Bobby walked over with supplies and indicated Sam’s shirt. “Help me strip him down to his pants. Need to make sure his arm hasn’t been broken again and see if there is any other damage.”  
  
“Not sure I’m up for a threesome.” Sam giggled. He really didn’t handle hard liquor very well.  
  
Bobby took the comment in stride, it didn’t even faze him. He simply eyed Dean who shrugged as if he didn’t know what Sam was talking about.  
  
Once he was stripped to the waist, Sam just clutched Dean’s shirt and wouldn’t let go. “I’m not going anywhere, Sammy.” Dean promised. “Fuck.” He looked down at Sam and saw how the demons claws had dug into his brother’s shoulder. Sam’s back was bruised and he was pretty sure a couple of ribs were broken. “Michael had him captured, I had to work with someone who called himself Steve.”  
  
“Steven.” Bobby nodded. “I’ve heard of him. Michael’s little brother.”  
  
“You’re kidding, right?” Dean was busy washing Sam’s wounds. He ignored the shudder of pleasure as he accidentally brushed a nipple.  
  
If Bobby noticed, he chose to ignore it. “No. Michael was once one of the good guys, you know. They were hunters once; they had what people called divine power. I don’t know what it was but it sure as hell wasn’t divine. They were cocky bastards and told people they were angels doing gods will. They could take the form of Seraphim if they chose, but they weren’t angels. Their pop was a preacher, cult leader. I think that’s where the fanaticism came from. He ran a cult that basically drew in hunters. The problem with getting a lot of hunters together is that it tends to draw their enemies. Their pop was killed; the boys went on a rampage led by Michael. Story goes he massacred an indian settlement, women and children. They turned bad, real bad. Story goes that some of the brothers have died since then and there are only few left in hiding. Your dad found Michael about ten years ago following up on the death of a woman. Had a hell of a time convincing him to give that one up. You just don’t want to get into that territory.”  
  
“That would explain his weakness.” Dean handed Bobby the dagger. “Blood of a slain child.”  
  
Bobby sniffed, “At any rate. He’s bad news. Any kind of religious cult members are bad news. You’re telling me Steven was working with you?”  
  
“Yeah, he said something about Michael wanting to kill Sam for redemption and he didn’t want Sam dead. What I don’t get is who the hell are the other people hunting Michael? The ones that he killed? He cut them in two.”  
  
“Messengers probably” Bobby shrugged. “Michael doesn’t want to talk to hell. Hell wants to talk to him. Looks like Hell has got to his brothers though if as you say Steven is working against him. They can’t kill him, but they want him back on the team.”  
  
“Makes sense to me.” Dean nodded. He looked down at Sam who was half asleep now and curling against him. Dean gazed down at Sam who was murmured a little in his sleep and clung to him.  
  
Bobby lifted an eyebrow. “You wanna talk?”  
  
Dean gave him a ‘how the hell did you know?’ look and Bobby just smirked.  
  
“You’re just like your father, that’s how I know.” Bobby winked.  
  
“Dude, I don’t want to know.” Dean glared. “Listen. We’re messed up right now, Bobby, and I don’t know how to fix it.” He sighed. “Something happened. I think there was something pushing me. Anyway, I hurt Sam. Most of the damage is from me, Bobby.” He petted his brother’s shoulder gently, soothing him.  
  
Bobby poured both of them some strong scotch. “If you ask me, I think you’re running too hard, Dean.”  
  
“Don’t you get it? I can’t, Bobby. He’s my brother, I love him, yes. But I don’t want to hurt him.”  
  
“Ever stop to think that that love you have might be what’s kept you alive all this time?”  
  
Dean stared at him.  
  
“There’s an old saying, kiddo.” Bobby nodded. “Love conquers all.”  
  
“That’s just sentimental crap.” Dean snorted. “Love didn’t save my Mom. Love didn’t save my dad.”  
  
“But it did save you Dean. Twice, I know what’s happened to your Daddy.” Bobby said with a sigh. “I’ve known since he passed. Real power is within. They tell you you’re nothing compared to Sam. They tell you they don’t care about you. But it’s you they want. You’re like your Mom. You’ve got a gift, Dean. Don’t waste it.”  
  
Dean watched Bobby get up and head out to his workshop. Sam stirred against him and slipped his hand to Dean’s thigh. He sighed and looked down at his brother. Somehow Sam had managed to maneuver him onto the couch and was pressed up against him. Dean draped an arm around Sam’s shoulders and his brother sighed and finally settled down. He pressed his lips to Sam’s hair.  
  
_You’ve got a gift, Dean. Don’t waste it._  
  
He feared that he already had.  
  
***  


Dean had maybe managed an hour of sleep when Bobby came in and shook him slightly. “Dean, the beds are made up in my guest room. We need to get Sam comfortable.”  
  
Dean grunted, “Yeah, you’re right.”  
  
“And you should eat something. When’s the last time you had food? I made dinner. We should get Sam to bed and you should eat.”  
  
“Is that the burning I smell?” Dean raised an eyebrow.  
  
“I happen to be a very good cook.” Bobby smirked. “Come on, God, he weighs a ton.”  
  
Dean chuckled, “He’s been working out a lot.”  
  
They half dragged, half carried Sam to the back of the house. The guest room was not bad. There were a couple of double sized beds and no windows except for a small airvent. Dean remembered the room well. He and Sam had been left with Bobby a few times in the past.  
  
He smiled when he saw the same sheets. “You still got Sam’s batman sheets?”  
  
“Yeah.” Bobby chuckled. “No other kids around to use them.”  
  
Dean fluffed the pillows and eased Sam’s broken body onto the bed with a sigh. His brother refused to release him, his fingers clutched in his shirt in a death grip. “Sammy, come on.” Dean cajoled.  
  
“Dean.” Sam’s eyes fluttered. “Where are we?” He yawned and groaned. “Hurts everywhere.”  
  
“Safe.” He told Sam with a reassuring smile. “Come on, kiddo.”  
  
Sam sighed, “Stay with me.”  
  
“I’ll be right out that door, Sam. See I can even see you from the kitchen.”  
  
“Dean…” Sam eyes implored him.  
  
Shit. He pursed his lips together. “Bobby, can you bring it in here?”  
  
“Yeah, sure, I got a card table I can set up.” Bobby nodded.  
  
Dean sat on the edge of Sam’s bed, relieved when his brother settled back down. He wanted so badly to tell him how much he was sorry when Sam licked his lips and begged. “Kiss me goodnight?”  
  
The plea tore into his heart and he could not say no. He glanced over at the kitchen. Bobby was busy in there still so he nodded and linked his fingers with Sam’s. He leant down and touched their lips together. That wasn’t enough for Sam. There was a whimper of need and the kiss became something much less innocent. Their tongues twisted together, tangled in a mess of wet heat. Sam’s hand reached up so he could thread his long fingers through Dean’s short hair.  
  
Bobby noticed it from the kitchen. It was hard not to see what was going on in that room with the door wide open. He wondered what John would say. Then again, John couldn’t say much after their last encounter. He would never admit to Sam and Dean just how much John’s death hit him. If the boys knew, he wasn’t sure they’d look at their father in the same light. His heart ached for them. They were obviously in love and lust and so very confused. They needed someone to trust and he was that person. For John, he would have done just about anything. He’d protect the boys as best he could. That was his job now. They didn’t have anyone else.  
  
Dean let Sam’s lips go. “Sleep, Sammy.” He told his brother with a forced smile.  
  
“Mmm.” Sam nodded. “Don’t leave the room.” He told Dean as he turned over onto his stomach and wrapped his arms into the pillows. “My back hurts.” He whimpered.  
  
Dean stroked his hair until Sam’s was breathing normally and finally asleep.  He checked out Sam’s broken arm, keeping it comfortable.  
  
Bobby cleared his throat and Dean glanced up with a half scowl, half guilty expression.. “Take it easy.” Their friend shrugged. He indicated the card table he’d set up while the boys had been busy. Dean’s brows knit.  
  
“I didn’t hear you come in the room.”  
  
“You had your hands full.” Bobby chuckled as he sat down. “Eat, Dean.” He opened a bottle of beer and set it before the elder Winchester.  
  
“You’re awfully calm about this.” Dean saw the steak and potatoes and his stomach rumbled fiercely. He wasn’t one to pass up free food, so he quickly began the process of stuffing his face. “You saw us.”  
  
“How long has this been going on?” Bobby asked.  
  
“Do you want an honest answer?”  
  
“Yeah, it might help clear a few things up.”  
  
“It just happened recently.” Dean explained. “But it’s been there in the back of my mind for a long time. I had it under control, Bobby. Completely. I don’t know, I must have snapped.”  
  
“Dean” Bobby frowned, “Did you? Uh… “  
  
“Rape Sam? Is that what you’re asking? If you thought I did that why the hell am I not face down in the dirt and pushing up daisies?”  
  
“I don’t think you did, Dean. I know you. You wouldn’t do that. This whole thing, it seems wrong to me somehow. You would never hurt Sam and yet you did. Doesn’t that strike you as odd? If you could resist him for 22 years and suddenly you can’t, didn’t you stop and think why that is?”  
  
Dean frowned, “What are you saying Bobby?”  
  
“I’m saying they're pushing you.” Bobby nodded. “Yeah, it all makes sense now. Reminds me of the last time I saw your father. They pushed him too.” Bobby didn’t go into detail. Instead, he stroked his beard. “I think you’re under some kind of spell, Dean. I’m just not sure what yet. It’s subtle, and it’s ingenious, I’ll give it that. It may be wearing off. I have a few tricks up my sleeve and I’ll take a look at my books tonight.”  
  
“So you’re saying they pushed me to hurt him to fulfill some sick desire in me?” Dean hissed. They were both speaking quietly so not to wake up Sam.  
  
“No they tapped into your dark side. It’s what devils do, Dean. They use what’s good inside you and twist it. I told you before; you have strength in you that demons crave. Your heart is pure, and you love your brother. You’re the only thing standing between them and Sam and you are a pain in their asses. Oh they want you alright. They want you badly. They got John and they want you to sweeten the deal. What they’re doing is using your weakness against you.”  
  
“You mean using Sam against me?”  
  
“Yes.”  
  
Dean sighed. “How do I fight it?”  
  
“One problem at a time” Bobby noted. “You need to get your strength back; we need to counter the spell, figure out who cast it, then waste ‘em. We can worry about your double cross act when we have to deal with it. I’m sure Stephens not going to let that go. He’ll be around sooner or later.”  
  
“What about Michael?”  
  
“I can handle Michael.” Bobby said nonchalantly. “Good steak?”  
“Not bad.” Dean smirked. “Bobby?”  
  
“Yeah?”  
  
“Thanks. I mean, thanks for not freaking out.”  
  
“Dean, I’ve seen a lot in my life. You kissing your little brother is small on the scale of shocks I’ve had. In fact, I’d often wondered what you were waiting for.” Bobby chuckled at the look on Dean’s face.  
  
“Was I that obvious?”  
  
“You act tough, but you melt into goo around Sam.” Bobby grinned.  
  
“I do –not-.” Dean huffed.  
  
“It’s hard to watch Tough as Nails Dean Winchester when he looks a certain way at his brother. Its subtle, my friend. But to those of us who know you, it’s like you’re a kid staring into a window shop at Christmas time wishing for a toy that’s too expensive for his parents to buy. You changed when he left for Stanford. You became harder. Pushed everyone away, but I knew what turned out the light in your eyes. Sam’s smile makes it better, doesn’t it? Makes life worth it?”  
  
Everything Bobby was saying was true. Dean sighed and nodded. “It’s like the sun is shining.”  
  
“I know, Dean.” Bobby nodded. “Your father had that same smile.”  
  
And they left the discussion at that while Dean finished up his meal. He truly admired Bobby for his infallible loyalty. The man was a godsend. So was the meal. He grunted, and then yawned hugely.  
  
“Get some sleep. Don’t worry, all the protections are in place.” Bobby said as he cleared the table. “If Sam wakes up hungry, there’ll be leftovers in the fridge.”  
  
Dean nodded gratefully. He glanced over at his brother who was still out cold. “I think he’s down for the night.”  
  
“Night, Dean.” Bobby nodded.  
  
With Bobby gone, Dean shut the door and pulled off his shirt. He went into the bathroom to wash up a bit and returned to his bed to sit. He stared at his brother lying on his stomach, half naked, long legs sprawled over the bed. He hoped love was strong enough for what they were going through.  
  
He glanced at his bed and then at Sam’s. With a sigh, he pulled off his jeans and sat on the edge of his brother’s bed. He encouraged Sam to scoot over and only wound up with Sam’s legs wrapped around his. There were worse fates. He shifted to rest on the pillows and Sam shifted to rest on him. He felt his brother stir and stiffened slightly.  
  
“Dean?” Sam whispered into his neck.  
  
“Yeah.”  
  
“You’re in my bed.”  
  
“Uh-huh.”  
  
“Dude, you’re naked.” Sam couldn’t suppress a snicker. He was very obviously teasing.  
  
“I’ve got underwear on.”  
  
“You might as well be naked.” Sam pressed against him and groaned in pain. “Fuck and I’m too weak to take advantage of you.”  
  
Dean laughed at that. “I’d love to see you try.”  
  
“Just you wait”  
  
Dean pressed his lips to Sam’s hair. “Rest, you can take advantage of me when you’re not a walking bruise.”  
  
“Promise?”  
  
“Sure.”  
  
“Cross your heart?” One of Sam’s fingers made a cross over Dean’s heart.  
  
“Yeah. Go back to sleep, Sam.”  
  
“Are we safe?” Sam wondered, finally coherent enough to glance around. “We’re at Bobby’s.”  
  
“Yes and yes.” Dean curled their fingers together.  
  
“Mmmm.” Sam bussed his cheek against Dean’s chest. “I have no energy but you know what I’d do if I did?”  
  
“Christ, Sam. Just go to sleep already.”  
  
He lifted his head to whisper in Dean’s ear. “I”d be fucking –you- until you couldn’t see straight.”  
  
Dean stared at Sam who just grinned and closed his eyes.  
  
Aw hell, how was he going to sleep after –that- information?  
  
***

  
Sam was warm and snug. He smiled at the feel of hard muscle against him. He was in a lovely morning haze where reality had not yet set in. He knew Dean was underneath him because he could hear his brother’s heart beating and he decided that he wasn’t going to move until Dean wanted to. It was just too good. His cast rested on his brother’s stomach, cradled gently in one of Dean’s arm. Dean’s fingers were threaded in his hair. Heaven, this was heaven. He didn’t care about everything that had happened. This was worth it.  
  
Well, except for the small problem of a morning erection, he squirmed slightly.  
  
Sam’s curiosity eventually got the better of him. He wanted to see if Dean had one too but the blanket was pulled up to their waists. Another problem was the position he was in. His good hand was wrapped underneath his brother and he couldn’t very well use his broken arm. “Dean?” He whispered after he couldn’t stand it any longer. He was so fucking hard.  
  
Dean laughed quietly, “I wondered how long it would take you.” He opened one eye then the other.  
  
Sam grunted. “Jerk, you could have said you were awake.”  
  
Dean smirked. “Sleep hasn’t been easy since your comment last night. You’re nice and hard there, little brother. What is it you want?” He stroked his fingers through Sam’s hair.  
  
“Wanna be inside you.” Sam whispered, no longer ashamed.  
  
“What makes you think I’m going to let you?” Dean raised an eyebrow. Sam pouted; it was a magnificent thrust of his bruised lower lip. Dean just had to laugh again. He leant down to capture the pout in heated kiss. “You’ve always been easy to tease, Sam.”  
  
Sam eyed him, breathless. “You’ll let me?”  
  
“Yeah” Dean nodded. He wasn’t a stranger to sex with a man and normally was on top, but given what he’d put Sam through, he needed to make up for it.  
  
Sam squinted at him, “You’re not just saying this to appease me, are you? You’ve done this?”  
  
“Yeah” he nodded.  
  
Sam frowned. “I’ve been uh… looking into it. But I haven’t.”  
  
“I know” Dean smiled. “You haven’t got a clue how to proceed, eh?”  
  
Sam flushed, “Something to do with fingers and stretching and uh… Quit laughing at me.”  
  
Dean couldn’t help it; Sam was so cute when he was flustered. “With your fingers, you’ll be a quick study.” He shivered at the idea of Sam’s long fingers stretching him.  
  
“There’s something I need to tell you first. I was out of control, Sam. I hurt you.” Dean’s voice was soft and gentle. “And I’m sorry. I can’t begin to tell you how sorry I am. I should have listened to you. Bobby says there is some kind of spell on me, pushing me. I had this under control for a long time, Sammy. I wanted you before this, but I’ve always kept control, always. I don’t want to hurt you. That’s the last thing I want. I think of what I did and said.” He cleared his throat. “I’m sorry, Sammy.”  
  
Sam stared at Dean and memorized the way his face looked, his eyes, the emotion. It pretty much was as close as Dean got to admit his feelings and was probably as close as he was going to get to a heart to heart. “I understand. I do, Dean.” He let a smile tug at his lips. “There’s um, some lube in my bag and condoms.”  
  
Dean’s eyebrows rose. “Something tells me, I’m going to regret this.” He joked. “Since I don’t have telekinetic power you need to let me go so I can get to your bag.”  
  
Sam obliged with a sigh and unwrapped from around Dean. He groaned from the pain of movement.  
  
‘You sure you’re up to this?” Dean wasn’t moving too quickly himself, though his wounds weren’t as bad as Sam’s. He flipped on a light to find his brother’s bag and stepped out of his boxers. .  
  
“Hell, yes.” Sam growled, to hell with his complaining muscles. He wanted to tell Dean just how beautiful he was when his brother glanced back and winked.  
  
“I’m just that sexy, huh?” Dean said.  
  
Sam’s face flushed. “Jerk. I’m just not going to pass up the chance to fuck you.” Sam decided that now was the time to get out of the jeans currently confining his complaining bits.  
  
“Bitch” Dean responded fondly as he watched Sam strip. He analyzed damage and appreciated every part that was quickly revealed. Then he frowned, ‘I’m not sexy? Hundreds of girls would beg to differ.” Dean leant against the other bed and eyed Sam.  
  
“Dean!” Sam snorted. “Ok, you’re hot, yes. Now, Come back here” He crooked a long finger.  
  
“Maybe I should make you work for it,” Dean smirked and dangled the lube, “since I’m not sexy.”  
  
Sam reached out for the bottle, but Dean pulled it away. Sam nearly toppled off the bed, but of course he was easily caught. A bit of horseplay later and Dean found himself underneath a very determined not so little brother  
  
“Thought you were injured?” Dean groaned.  
  
“I’m younger than you; it means I have more energy, old man.” Sam snickered.  
  
It’s the legs, Dean decided. Sam was holding him down with those long, muscular legs. “You’re taking advantage of the situation. You know I’m not going to hit you or risk further damage.” He accused.  
  
It was Sam’s turn to dangle the lube with a cheeky grin. “Yeah, I do.”  
  
Dean snorted. In spite of his gruffness, he wanted this more than he would admit. He moved his legs, bent his knees slightly and let Sam kneel between them. He smiled up at his brother who set the lube down on the bed and just gazed at Dean.  
  
Sam’s breath was hitched in his throat. He swallowed and sighed and glared at his bandaged arm. “I only have one hand to touch you with.” He complained as he slid his long fingers up and down one of Dean’s thighs and teased the hairs.  
  
“mmmhmm…” Dean’s eyes lidded. He quickly became hard as he felt Sam’s cock rest against his. He moved one hand to lie across both of them and instigated some badly needed friction.  
  
He was rewarded with a groan, and Sam leant down to kiss Dean. The kiss didn’t stop with a touch of the lips. It quickly became a challenge to see who could keep control of it the longest. His body hummed with need as he rocked forward. He fumbled one handed as he opened the tube and clumsily coated his fingers. Dean’s legs shifted.  
  
He was still sucking on Dean’s tongue when he slipped one long finger between Dean’s buttocks. He didn’t penetrate, he only teased. It seemed impossibly small to his large digit and he didn’t want to screw this up. “Dean” He gasped for breath and conceded defeat to his brother’s talented mouth.  
  
Dean pressed down against his finger, “Don’t think, Sam.” He told him. “Do it.” His lips were captured again. He’d have to admit, Dean was the best kisser in the world. He’d never experienced anything like his brother’s insistent tongue. Dean’s hands had since left their cocks and he was wildly roaming Sam’s body. He pushed his finger in and gasped. He felt Dean grip him and tense. He wasn’t allowed to worry or stop because Dean wouldn’t let him. “More, all the way Sam, god your fingers are huge,” he heard Dean groan enthusiastically.  
  
Sam grinned, nipping Dean’s lips. “You like this? What does it feel like?”  
  
“Sam.” Dean gave him a warning grunt. “Do not make me talk during sex or I swear to god I -am- going to kick your ass. It’d hurt a hell of a lot more if I hadn’t done this before. Move it around. Stretch me. Jesus” He swore.  
  
Sam wiggled his fingers with an amused smile as he stared at the various expressions on Dean’s face. “You’re so gorgeous.”  
  
“Shut up, Sam. Another.” Dean barked. His fingers dug into Sam’s shoulder and he exhaled when a second long digit joined the first. “Oh yea… yeah that’s it.” His head fell back against his pillow and he bucked his hips up.  
  
Sam was mesmerized by the vision. Dean writhed underneath him as his own cock twitched in expectation and he vaguely noticed Dean grope for a condom.  
  
Sam’s fingers were so long and thick, it already felt like there were three in there. Dean whimpered. Shit, he was going to go insane if Sam didn’t stop brushing by his prostrate accidentally and got on with it. “Stop shifting them. Shit. Sam. There. Yeah!” Dean growled. His back arched and he shuddered. “Again!”  
  
Oh! Sam’s eyes widened. Somehow he had touched that spot he’d read about. He smiled and worked his fingers back into place. He watched as Dean bit his lip and trembled. He didn’t think he’d ever seen anything so beautiful n his life as Dean on the verge of an orgasm. He felt his brother’s fingers on his cock and he almost came right there but their only task was to slip on the condom. Jesus, what he was about to do finally hit him.  
  
Dean nodded at the unspoken question, “Now, Sam.”  
  
Sam drew in a shaky breath. “Christ, Dean.” He gasped as he drew his fingers out and positioned himself. “It’s too small.”  
  
“Samm…” Dean warned. Next time, he was going to find away to muzzle his brother. Or maybe not, there was too much he could do with his mouth. “Just push.”  
  
Sam sighed and nudged Dean’s lips with his. He gasped and nearly cried out at the sudden heat around his cock. Shit. Sweat trickled down Dean’s neck. “Dean?”  
  
“Keep pushing.” Dean directed. “Oh yeah….oh god, yes!” His wildest dream come true, Dean felt his inner walls contracting against the sweet intrusion. His own cock leaked against Sam’s stomach as he waited to be fully impaled. He ran his hands through Sam’s hair, down his back up his muscles tugging and pinching on feverish skin. “All the way, please Sam, don’t stop now.” He panted.  
  
As for Sam, his eyes were so dark with desire and strain he didn’t know was possible. The warmth, and oh Jesus, the sheer inexplicable pleasure of being so deep inside the one person in the world he loved more than life itself. He tried to balance on one arm and sighed when he felt Dean catch his wounded arm and hold it gently. “I’ve got you.” Dean said softly. “Move, Move! I mean now, Sam.”  
  
And so he did. Captured by Dean completely, Sam could only do as bid. His brother’s legs tightened around him and the intensity of it was almost too much to handle. They kissed again, but this time there was nothing to hold back. There was too much to taste the first time, too much to need. It was their deliverance from the evil that surrounded them. They could drown in each other and block out the rest of reality while they sucked, nibbled and tugged on skin so hot it could burn the devil himself. There were words, but nothing was coherent. There were sounds and that was all that anyone would need to know that these two were so connected in pure passion that nothing short of divine intervention would break them.  
  
When Sam came inside him, Dean thought he had felt something like heaven open up and swathe him in a warm fuzzy light. Sam had managed to find his prostrate and work him into passionate frenzy. He’d come a few moments before and they rode out the aftermath as the bed shook beneath them. Sam collapsed on top of Dean and buried his face in his brother’s neck.  
  
Exhausted and out of breath, Dean blinked and held onto Sam. Gently he eased his brother out and took care of the condom. Sam shivered and whimpered. They lay like that until after a while, Dean grunted. “Sam, I need to breathe.”  
  
Sam shifted back to their original position, his face still buried against Dean’s neck. His lips brushed skin as he did so.  
  
“You ok?” Dean asked in concern. “You know, that gave a whole new meaning to the words _fuck you into the mattress_. I don’t think I’m gonna move for a week.”  
  
“I’m fine.” Sam mumbled.  
  
‘Need a painkiller?”  
  
“Yeah, Euphoria only does so much.” Sam replied.  
  
Dean stretched for the bottle and glass of water he’d left by Sam’s bed. “Here.”  
  
Sam took the prescription medication. “You need anything?”  
  
Dean shook his head. “Nah, I’m good.” He smiled, damp with sweat.  
  
Sam wasn’t that much better off, his skin glistened in the lamplight and his hair stuck to his forehead haphazardly. “Dean, that was-“  
  
“I know, Amazing.” He grinned at Sam nonchalantly. “You really think I’d let you down?” He winked. “I’m a sex God, you know.”  
  
“You didn’t do –all- the work.” Sam huffed.  
  
Dean played with the back of Sam’s hair. “Now, love. I am going to pass out. Do me a favor and don’t wake me up till next week, ok? I think by then my body will have recovered.”  
  
“Dean?”  
  
“What?”  
  
“You don’t expect me to wait a week to do that again, do you?” Sam put a great deal of effort into the pout and look he gave Dean just then.  
  
That earned him a glare.  
  
*  
  
Sam had got away intact, and Steven knew that’s all father had wanted. The problem was that Michael had escaped him. Michael had tasted Sam’s blood and would track him down. There was of course, the most logical place to find the boys. He knew where they would have gone. Michael didn’t, not yet. He might still get there in time. There was an easy way to travel of course but a familiar face would get to the boys faster than not. Steve knew that he was giving his existence so Sam could live. He accepted that part of his fate.  
  
The fact that Dean had betrayed him to suffer Michael’s wrath would earn that particular Winchester a one way ticket to be the life of the party that eagerly waited for him.  
  
*  
  
Bobby was sure of it now. He knew what he had to do to break whatever was latched on to Dean. He only worried that he was going to ruin what the boys had now. He’d have to tell them when they woke up. Well, when they got up anyway. He smirked, taking a pull of his beer. He pulled out his wallet and took out a picture of him and John, taken back on one of their first hunts together.  
  
“You always knew, didn’t you, Johnny.” He sighed. “I know what I have to do now. I just hope it works.”  
  
***  


Dean opened one eye the next morning to the exceedingly pleasant sensation of Sam’s tongue on his neck and his hand doing a very good job of making sure that even if Dean wasn’t coherent, he was up.  
  
“Good morning.” Sam whispered. Every muscle ached and yet his body eagerly responded to his brother’s touch. He really needed a shower and food and Sam. Oh god, yes. Sam. “I was beginning to wonder what it would take to wake you.” Sam said softly.  
  
“Apparently you found a way.” Dean grunted. Sam’s hand nearly covered his entire cock. His legs bent slightly as he lifted himself into the touch. He swallowed and couldn’t help but dig his fingers into Sam’s shoulder. It didn’t take long for warm seed to spill between those long sensual digits. He panted and stared at Sam, eyes glazed. “That wasn’t fair; you’d been working me for a long time before I woke up.” He complained.  
  
“You’re up, now.” Sam said with a twinkle in his eye as he nipped Dean’s cheek.  
  
“Sam, we can’t stay like this the whole day.” Not that this was unpleasant, but they had things to do. “I really need a shower.”  
  
Sam propped himself up to stare at Dean, it began to dawn on him that Dean didn’t want sex just then. Nor did he want to talk. “Shower, ok.” Sam nodded.  
  
“Sam.” Dean eyed his brother, Sam had –that- look in his eye. Dean sat up and immediately winced. Yeah, there was going to be some difficulty sitting for a while. “Look.” He reached up to play with the hair on the back of his brother’s neck. “This thing between us, I loved it. Ok? I want it, just not now. We have shit to take care of, and..” Dean paused as Sam turned to look him in the eye.  
  
“And what?” Sam’s voice was too soft, too controlled.  
  
“Aw, Hell, Sammy. You know me. I’m not going to change overnight.” Dean sighed. “I’m the way I am.”  
  
Sam knew that very well. “What are you trying to say, Dean?”  
  
“Don’t try and make me into what I’m not, Sam.” Dean swung his legs over the bed. “I’m not Prince Charming, and I’m not going to suddenly change into Mr Perfect either just because we’re fucking now.”  
  
“Do you have to make it sound so crude?” Sam hated it when Dean put everything into terms that made him feel cheap. It hadn’t been cheap, it had been perfect. It had been the best sex Sam ever had.  
  
“It is what it is, Sam. Sex isn’t bunnies and fluff.” Dean snorted. “Look.” He stood. “I’m trying to say that you can’t force me to be what I’m not. I want you, I love what we did and I want to do it again, but touchy feely ain’t my gig, Sam. You know that. And I like girls too, a lot. I’m not trying to hurt you Sam, I’m just… this is the way I am.”  
  
He knew, and no matter how much it hurt, Sam responded quietly. “Dean, it’s ok. I don’t want to change you. It’s fine. I understand. I love you the way you are.”  
  
Dean didn’t know why those words made him feel worse but it did. He shifted from one foot to the other. After a few moments he nodded. “I love you too, Sam. Come on, join me in the shower, we’ll kill two birds with one stone.” He winked and nodded towards Sam’s still hard cock.  
  
Dean’s response lifted Sam’s mood and he smiled. “I’ll just wrap my arm first.” He carefully stood up mindful of all the pain.  
  
It was going to work out. Dean was sure.  
  
*  
  
Dean came out first, showered, refreshed and quite thoroughly fucked. He eased onto a chair and reached for an apple.  
  
“Hard night?” Bobby smirked. He poured pancake mix onto the pan. He knew very well what had gone on in that room since he left Dean alone with Sam.  
  
Dean stretched his legs out, groaned and shifted again.  
  
“You know, if you wear yourselves out you’re not going to be able to fight.” Bobby noted.  
  
“Point taken.” Dean returned the smirk. “But what a way to go…”  
  
Bobby just rolled his eyes.  
  
*  
  
Sam pulled on his shirt and ran a comb through his hair. He truly was a walking bruise now, he decided. The pain medication wasn’t helping much but he’d have to learn to deal with it. He knew he shouldn’t be feeling like this. He knew that he had to trust Dean and that Dean did love him. The idea of watching his brother hit on a woman was churning in his stomach. Why wasn’t he enough? Sam sighed.  
  
Nothing would be enough for someone like Dean. Trying to hold him down would be next to impossible, especially if he wasn’t ready. Would he be able to deal with this ache? He couldn’t deal with the idea of not having Dean at all. Now that he’d been inside his brother twice there was no going back. He craved the heat and needed Dean. He knew he couldn’t change his brother. Dean was the way he was. He just wished he was a little more sensitive. Sam sighed at himself. “Now you really are acting like a girl.” He told his reflection in the mirror. His stomach growled, god he was hungry. It was time to get back to reality.  
  
*  
  
Sam was greeted by the delightful smell of pancakes and fruit and fresh maple syrup when he walked into the kitchen. He slid his gaze to Dean who was already stuffing his face.  
  
“Sorry, couldn’t wait, these are just too good.” He told Sam.  
  
“Hey Sam, you were pretty out of it last night when Dean brought you here. Feeling better?” Bobby asked as he stacked a plate.  
  
“Yeah, much.” Sam sat down and accepted the plate.  
  
Bobby exchanged a glance with Dean. “You haven’t told him?”  
  
“Told him what?” Dean smothered a pancake in butter, berries and syrup. Sam couldn’t help but watch his fingers as he licked them. “Oh!” He grinned at Sam. “Bobby knows, Sam.”  
  
Bobby knows? Just what did Bobby know? Sam looked between the two of them, confused.  
  
Dean said between mouthfuls, “He knows about us.”  
  
Sam blinked a few times and cleared his throat. He met Bobby’s gaze and was surprised by what he found there, understanding.  
  
Having dealt with John in the past, Bobby knew exactly what Sam was going through. Dean was almost exactly like John and had as much trouble being sensitive. Maybe he’d tell Sam one day, but not now. “Yeah, it’s ok Sam. I’ve been there.” He put some extra berries on Sam’s plate.  
  
Sam swallowed. “Thanks.” He looked down at his plate and began to eat. It really was good and kind of nice to have a home cooked meal.  
  
“Bobby, did you find out anything about how to handle the situation we discussed last night?” Dean asked after a few minutes.  
  
“Yeah.” Bobby nodded. “But you’re not going to like it.”  
  
“Lay it on me.”  
  
*  
  
Steve pulled up his car to the junk yard and wrinkled his nose. It smelled of hunter. More than that, it smelled of Winchester and John’s scent still lingered. He wondered why father hadn’t destroyed this place yet. He’d done some research on this one. He was a hunter of demons, he knew all the lore and yet he now chose to hide in this spot in the middle of nowhere. He chose to let John Winchester stay in hell.  
  
He started walking to the front door when he saw Dean standing a few yards from the door, gun in hand. “I see you were expecting me.”  
  
Dean snorted. “You didn’t seriously think you could waltz right in after what you did to me? After what you did to Sam?”  
  
Steve smirked, “I don’t think I was the one to do anything to Sam. Besides, you’re the one who broke our contract.”  
  
“We never had a contract.”  
  
“Nothing official of course, but still,” Steve didn’t seem all that concerned about Dean and his gun. “You don’t make bargains with devils and expect to come out unscathed. Where is Sam? Whether you believe it or not, I’m here to protect him. Michael’s coming.”  
  
Dean kept his gun fixed on Steve.  
  
“Oh please.” Steve rolled his eyes. “You don’t really think that’s going to hurt me do you?”  
  
Dean cocked the gun and fired. “You are in for one hell of a surprise.” The bullet passed into Steve’s shoulder and he staggered back.  
  
Pain laced through the demon’s body. “What the hell?” His body had begun to sizzle and fry.  
  
Dean strode forward, firing. Steve was down on the ground, choking from the pain. “You should really look where you are stepping before you walk onto it.” He told Steve as he stood directly over him. “This road has been dosed in holy water and contains a blood ritual that binds any demon who steps foot on it and renders it vulnerable.”  
  
Steve did not have time to respond as his body burst into flames and fire consumed him.  
  
Dean looked down at the ashes with a smirk.  
  
Sam stood at the doorway, pale and weak, his eyes fixed on Dean Bobby rested a hand on his shoulder knowing exactly what Sam was going through. Dean had just killed the thing that had been subtly influencing him to act on his desires. He knew the questions running through Sam’s head because he’d asked them before, ten years ago.  
  
*  
  
_The argument was one of many they’d had in the last six months. John was instant on finding the demon that caused this whole mess. To Bobby, it wasn’t a mess. But to John, he’d hurt his best friend and was consumed by the desire to get rid of the thing that made him forget himself.  
  
“You can’t do this, John.” Bobby spread his hands as he watched his lover load weapons into his car. He had a bad feeling in the pit of his stomach; John was consumed with vengeance and always had been.  
  
“I can and I will, Bob. Listen to me, for god sake. I’ve found it, I know where it lives. I’m going to destroy it. Make it pay for what it did to us. I’m not going to let it hurt anyone else.”  
  
“Let it go, John.” Bobby caught his sleeve.  
  
“I’m sorry, I can’t.” John exhaled. “Look, Bobby, I know you think that things are going to change if I kill it. They’re not. I promise you. They’re not going to change. I’ll be back.”  
  
“It’s just that you’ve been happy, John. I saw you smile. I don’t want to lose you.” Bobby stuck his hands in his pockets as he watched John.  
  
John reached over and set his hand on the back of Bobby’s neck. He smiled, “Trust me, Bobby. I’ll be back.”  
  
But John hadn’t come back, not to continue where they’d left off. Bobby was lucky if he saw him once or twice a year. Each time, the kids had been with him. Each time, John never brought up the demon, or the past until the last fight they had and he’d told John to get the hell away from him and never come back. That’s when he’d brought out the shotgun. John last words to him had been meant to hurt and meant to get him out of his life.  
  
Now Bobby knew why.  
_  
*  


There was a flicker of light around Dean, subtle multi-colored light and he blinked several times and shook his head as though clearing it. The lights dissipated and he exhaled. Now that Dean had killed Steve the spell was broken.  
  
He stood up to see Bobby and Sam in the doorway. “That son of a bitch had it coming.” He kicked at the ashes. “We’ll have more trouble with Michael, Michael can fly.”  
  
“What are you two staring at?” He raised his brows.  
  
“Dean?” Sam ventured.  
  
“Christ, Sam. It was just a demon, why do you look like I killed your best friend? Did I miss something? Fuck, I’m starving, let’s have lunch.”  
  
Bobby said under his breath to Sam. “After a spell has been lifted, the subject is always hungry.” He squeezed Sam’s shoulder.  
  
The reassurance didn’t do anything to ease Sam’s mind. In those few words he’d seen a change in Dean.  
  
He watched his brother walk back into the house and to the kitchen to pull out food. Dean sat down and grunted. “Fuck, I feel like I’ve had a run in with a tank.” He shifted on the chair. “My ass is killing me.”  
  
Sam sighed and looked at Bobby. “He doesn’t remember.” The younger Winchester’s helpless expression nearly broke Bobby’s heart.  
  
“Remember what?” Dean wanted to know. “Something happen?”  
  
“Sam, you knew there would be consequences.” Bobby began.  
  
“What the fuck?” Dean glared at the two of them. “What are you talking about? Sam? What’s wrong?”  
  
Sam looked down at the floor. “Forget it.”  
  
Bobby opened his mouth as if to say something but Sam had turned and walked out.  
  
“I need some air.” Sam stalked out of the building.  
  
“What’s with him?” Dean asked Bobby. “I swear he gets more sensitive every day. It’s like having a girl for a brother.”  
  
Bobby glared at Dean. “Now you listen to me, Dean Winchester and you listen well. I know you don’t remember everything that happened over the last few days but I’m not going to let you hurt Sam more than you already have, you get me? Now you go the hell out there and tell him you remember everything. I don’t care if you don’t. I want you to put aside this manly bullshit your father and you cling to and admit you love him and have wanted him since before this shit happened. If you don’t, so help me God, I’m going to make you regret it!”  
  
“Huh?” Dean stared, slack jawed.  
  
“Move it!” Bobby snarled.  
  
Dean had a feeling he was going to be sorry if he didn’t so he was out of the kitchen and after Sam like a shot. It didn’t take long to find him. Sam was standing by the Impala. His shoulders shook slightly. Hell, he was crying.  
  
“Sammy?”  
  
Sam’s head shot up and he glanced back at Dean. “I’m sorry, Dean. I c-can’t.”  
  
“Shit.” Dean stuck his hands in his pockets. “The last few days are hazy, Sammy. Tell me about them. Look. Whatever happened, we’ll deal with it ok? You’re my brother, Sam. Nothing’s going to change how I feel about you.”  
  
“This will.” Sam said a defeated look in his eyes.  
  
***  


Dean stared at Sam for a very long time after he heard the whole story. Sam had begun right from when he had started to act differently. He’d left out some details, he could tell but one particular one was impossible to make up. He knew because he could feel it and if he allowed himself he could remember. In fact, there were images in his mind of sex with Sam. It had nearly killed him to watch his brother’s tears. He’d been himself except that he hadn’t been. In order to release him from the spell, Sam had put his heart on the line and risked losing Dean. Bobby had known Dean would revert back and once the spell was gone the erratic behavior would stop. He’d said he had seen it happen before but wouldn’t elaborate.  
  
Part of it was true, he’d always been attracted to Sam but he’d never let himself be tempted to do anything about it. The entire time he’d been Dean, but under influence. Of course Sam was upset because there had been no such influence over Sam. Everything his little brother had done was real and from the heart. Sam wanted him and loved him. He looked at Sam’s hands, they were shaking. He looked up at his face. There was so much anguish that it tore into his soul. It was not just the tears that refused to stop falling even though Sam angrily wiped them away. It was not the trembling of Sam’s lips or the way he kept his distance from Dean.  
  
“I know.” Sam swallowed as he choked back a sob. “I know I can’t ever expect anything from you now, Dean. I’ll do anything you want. Just don’t leave me.”  
  
Oh God, he put his hands on Sam’s shoulders. “I’m not going to leave you.” He told Sam softly and pulled him into a tight hug.  
  
Sam sagged against Dean, he buried his head against his brother’s neck as his shoulders continued to shake. He was trying so hard to stop the tears. “It’s ok, Sammy” Dean could only think to say. “I’m not going anywhere. I’m not going to leave you.”  
  
*  
  
The next few days passed quickly for Dean as he and Bobby prepared to fight Michael. Sam was still too injured to take part in the battle and Dean had insisted on him getting rest. Nothing more had been said about sex or love. Dean had gone back to sleeping in a separate bed.  
  
The first night had been torture for Sam. He would open his eyes every so often and wish it wasn’t so dark in the room so he could see Dean’s face. He was unable to stop wanting the love he knew was still there. He’d just have to give Dean a little time.  
  
Bobby was all business with the two of them, but it was clear that he was pissed at Dean. He didn’t say it, but Dean could tell.  
  
After a while it started to irritate Dean enough that one day when Sam was out of ear shot he glared at his father’s old friend. “What is with you?”  
  
“I could ask you the same thing.” Bobby retorted.  
  
“I’m doing the best I can with this situation.” Dean growled. “You think it’s easy?”  
  
“No Dean, I don’t think it’s easy. But I think you’re killing your brother.” Bobby glared. “Don’t tell me you haven’t seen it.”  
  
“He’ll get over it.” Dean said defensively.  
  
“No he won’t Dean. This is not something you just get over. He’s broken and you won’t fix him.”  
  
“What am I supposed to do? He’s my little brother for God’s sake. I practically raised him.” Dean said between his teeth. “It’s wrong and you know it. I don’t know, I’ll find him a girl and he’ll forget all about it!”  
  
“This is Sam we’re talking about, Dean. He’s all or nothing. It may be wrong, but what you’re doing is a hell of a lot worse.”  
  
“What am I doing, Bobby?”  
  
“You’re denying it. You’re denying yourself the chance at love, Dean, a love more pure than you can possibly imagine. You’re denying it because –they- manipulated you. They’ve won after all. Every time you turn out that light, turn away from Sam and go to sleep you’re killing him and you are ruining any chance that things might work out for you boys.”  
  
“How can it possibly work out with the life we lead?” Dean demanded.  
  
“Make it work, Dean. Make it work because I can’t stand watching Sam die every time you don’t touch him.”  
  
Dean watched as Bobby stalked off. Sometimes the man had an uncanny way with words. He sighed. It wasn’t that he didn’t want Sam it was just that he’d hurt his brother badly and he didn’t know how to fix things.  
  
*  
  
“Dean? Bobby said I’d find you out here.” Sam came around the other side of the house.  
  
Dean stood by a workbench and was involved in the schematics of a crossbow they were working on. “Yeah, what’s up, Sammy?”  
  
“I’m feeling better now, not in quite so much pain. Can I help?” He glanced at the blueprint and pieces near Dean.  
  
They looked at each other for a long moment and Dean nodded. “Yeah, Sure.” He handed Sam a screwdriver. “Just remember which end to use.” He joked.  
  
The next few hours were the best Sam had had since the spell was broken on Dean. They acted like brothers again. The camaraderie was back and it felt right as they discussed how the crossbow was going to help defeat Michael.  
  
“See, I’m gonna coat the tips with the child’s blood on the dagger. I know it’s messy, but hey, it’ll work. Once we impale that sucker with a few of these, he’s screwed.” Dean grinned enthusiastically.  
  
Sam was pleased. The last thing he needed was to have Michael still out there wanting to kill him for redemption. However, he made the mistake of not noticing there was loose ply wood near his feet and he stumbled on the boards. Dean caught him in time and held him steady.  
  
Oh, God, how good it felt to be in Dean’s arms again. Sam almost wanted to fake injury just to remain there. He inhaled his brother’s scent and closed his eyes. “I’m fine, sorry, still a bit off balance.” He murmured.  
  
He expected Dean to release him immediately but that didn’t happen. Instead he felt fingers brush his hair. Sam’s eyes flew open and he saw Dean staring at him with an expression that made him shiver with hope.  
  
The kiss that followed was Sam’s salvation. He knew he hadn’t been the one to instigate it. Dean had closed the distance between their lips and was kissing him. It was soft at first but quickly turned into desperate need. When they parted, Dean panted against him and he wasn’t sure he’d remain upright if his brother let go of him.  
  
“Was that for real, Dean?” Sam wondered.  
  
Dean gave Sam a small smile and nodded. “Yeah. Bobby’s right, I’ve been denying it for too long. The spell was designed to tear us apart by tapping on my hidden desires and making me act on them. But that’s just it Sam. I’ve had them for a long time. I thought it was better not to do anything. I’m an idiot.” He adjusted Sam so he was upright and steady. “I need to touch you again, Sammy.”  
  
“Then touch me, Dean.” Sam’s heart was beginning to lift. “Take me wherever you want to go.”  
  
“Where, Sam?” Dean looked up at his brother, no longer able to deny what he wanted most in the world. “Where?”  
  
“To the place only you and I exist.”  
  
***  


If Dean hadn’t come to his senses, Bobby didn’t know what he would have done. He couldn’t watch it happen all over again and he was relieved that he didn’t have to intervene again. Watching them torment John had been more than he could bear.  
  
“Hey, Bobby” Sam loomed in the doorway to his workshop. Like Bobby, he was an early riser. Dean was still in bed. “Morning.”  
  
“Hey yourself Sam, you’re looking better today.” Bobby assessed the young man. He really did look better and there was color to his cheeks.  
  
“I am thanks.” It was true, Sam had never been happier in his life. Sleep in Dean’s arms was easy. Being in love with Dean was easy. It felt like the most natural thing in the world. “I have been meaning to ask you something. How did you know how to defeat Steven? You said you’d seen this happen before.”  
  
Bobby set down the special arrow heads he was working on for the bolts. He knew that Sam wouldn’t rest until he got a straight answer. As long as there was no chance of Dean overhearing, he’d explain. They both knew Dean was still asleep. The only time the elder Winchester got out of bed this early in the morning is if he absolutely had to. “Do you remember the last time you and your brother were here before John’s death? It was a few years ago, before you went to college.”  
  
“I remember. Dad was angry and you pulled out a shotgun on him and ordered us off.” Sam sat down to watch their friend.  
  
“Your Dad tended to bring out the worst in people.” Bobby crossed his arms as he leant against the workbench. “I don’t know why he kept coming back but I’d had enough. I think he knew that something bad was going to happen. I think that’s why he said what he came back again about a year before he died. He asked me to take care of you boys if anything happened to him. I told him to get the hell out of my life once and for all. I was sick of it. I was tired of him coming and going as he pleased. Sam. I love you and Dean like you’re my own kids. Your Dad, he chose the hunt. He could have had a life after Mary’s death, but he chose the hunt over everything. He chose it over you, over Dean… and over me. He was consumed by the desire for revenge.”  
  
Sam stared at Bobby, wide-eyed. “You’re joking. Oh god, you’re not.” He could only stare at Bobby in amazement. He’d never even guessed. “Jesus, don’t tell Dean.”  
  
“Sammy, you and I both know Dean has a rose colored version of his father. He imagines that John was some kind of perfect hero. But the fact is, he was a selfish bastard. And yes, he was put under the influence of the same thing Dean was. They were toying with him back then, pushing him, driving him over the edge. He’d come to me for sanity but couldn’t control himself. I tried helping him, Sam. I did what I could. We did eventually break the spell, but he stopped coming by regularly after that. The last time he was here, he had the nerve to tell me it was more than just lust that he did care and that he needed me onboard. So I asked him, why the hell was he still trying to get himself killed if that was true? The argument escalated, he tried to be aggressive so I pulled out my shotgun and told him I never wanted to see his face again. Looking back now, I know he did it on purpose. I know he knew he was walking into death.” Bobby shrugged. “I asked myself a million times if there was anything I could have done but there wasn’t. Once people like your father and Dean get something into their heads, there’s no changing their mind. They are so alike, it’s frightening sometimes.”  
  
“You were in love with my Dad.” Sam really was taking this very well, considering.  
  
“Since the minute he blundered into my life with you two in tow and demons on his mind.” Bobby sighed and nodded. “So, I know what you’re going through. Dean’s just like John.”  
  
“He’s not just like Dad, Bobby. He’ll be ok. He’s getting used to the idea of loving me.” Sam swallowed. “But, yes. I know. I know what’s going t happen as soon as we get back on the road. He won’t want to be held down.”  
  
“For your sake, Sam, I hope that doesn’t happen.” Bobby said sincerely.  
  
“Bobby, I also think you misjudged my Dad.” Sam said carefully. “Almost everyone we meet tells us how he pushed them all away and got on their bad side. You’re right; he knew he was in trouble. I think he knew that they were using his friends against him. Look at what happened to Pastor Jim and Caleb. I think it would have killed him if they got to you.”  
  
“Maybe you’re right, but it doesn’t matter now. He’s dead.” Bobby said with a sigh. “And as for you and Dean, well, we’ll see. Won’t we?”  
  
“Yeah” Sam nodded. “Don’t worry, I won’t tell him.”  
  
Sam made his way back to their bedroom and sat down on the edge of the bed to just stare down at Dean. He was so beautiful when he slept. All the cares in the world were gone; his eyes were not creased with worry lines. He reached to brush Dean’s hair and caress his cheek gently. Last night, he’d offered Dean the option of taking him instead. He still hadn’t felt what it was like. Dean had refused. Sam knew why, he was still hurt and Dean didn’t want to hurt him any more than he already was. He couldn’t love him any more for that.  
  
He ran his fingers over Dean’s chest and chuckled when he saw the slight bruises where he’d pinched and nibbled skin a bit too hard.  
  
“Something amuses you?” Dean inquired; he still had his eyes closed.  
  
“You bruise easily.” Sam leant down and kissed one of them.  
  
Dean snorted and yawned. “What time is it?”  
  
“6:30” Sam chuckled.  
  
‘Christ, what are you trying to do, kill me with lack of sleep?” Dean complained.  
  
“I was just coming back to bed.” Sam kicked off his boots and cuddled up to Dean. “I love you.” He whispered against his brother’s neck.  
  
“I don’t blame you.” Dean smirked.  
  
Sam hit him.  
  
*  
  
Michael was a little more difficult to take care of than Steve. A flying demon was harder to catch and even harder to shoot at. Dean didn’t want to waste crossbow bullets. He Dean and Bobby were trying to get Michael to land somewhere.  
  
Sam had been put into a protective circle and felt pretty useless while Bobby and Dean fought off the Demon. He began to panic when he saw Dean get flung backwards and when he dropped the cross bow, Sam couldn’t hold back any longer. He ran to pick it up.  
  
Dean was on his feet almost immediately and at Sam’s side. While Bobby distracted the creature, Dean rounded on Sam. “What are you thinking? Get back in the circle!” He flung Sam to the ground as Michael swooped down with a screech and sideswiped Dean. He suffered a gash to his cheek from Michael’s claws and his shirt was ripped open along his chest. “Get the fuck back there now, Sam!”  
  
Michael flew down towards the boys, Sam in particular. His eyes gleamed fire and his sword glowed in the moonlight and he brought it down only to get a crossbow bolt between the eyes from Bobby. Sam glanced over at Bobby and had never seen him like that before. The demon shrieked and sizzled from the effect of the child’s blood, it’s claws latched on to Bobby’s crossbow and it fought to wrench the thing away.  
  
Sam panted and crawled along the ground towards Dean who was doing a good job of bleeding into the mud. “Dean? Dean!” He tried to stop the flow of blood by bunching up Dean’s shirt and putting pressure on the wound.  
  
“Easy, Sammy. It’s not bad. I’m alright.” Dean reassured his brother. “Help Bobby.”  
  
Sam reached for Dean’s crossbow and fired at Michael. The hardest part about using a crossbow was reloading it. Sam struggled to get several more bolts off while Michael was in range. Luckily, the bolts were finally doing the trick and the demon burst into flames. Sam let go a sigh of relief.  
It was over.  
  
Bobby spat on the ground of the sizzling creature and murmured an incantation of some kind.  
  
Sam pulled at Dean. “Dean? Can you stand?”  
  
“Yeah”  
  
He helped Dean to his feet.  
  
“That was totally a totally dumbass move, Sammy.” Dean chided.  
  
“The hell it was.” Sam shook his head. “If you think I’m going to sit inside protection while you get your ass kicked, you’re brain dead.”  
  
“It was after you, Sam. You should have stayed protected.”  
  
“We got it, Dean. Michael’s gone. Let’s just get you cleaned and stitched up.” Sam looked over to Bobby. “It’s over right.”  
  
“For now” Bobby nodded, “until they send another one after you.”  
  
*  
  
_The yellow eyed Demon took a swipe at a piece of John’s flesh that had seen better days. He cupped his chin and glared at the hunter. “What do you think dear Bobby would say if he saw you now?”  
  
John did not even give the demon the pleasure of struggling. The things he had endured in the last however many months that had passed were worth it, if only to give the boys time. Nothing else mattered. “Leave him alone!” If anything happened to Bobby because of this, he’d never forgive himself.  
  
“I don’t think you’re in any position to give orders, Johnny my friend. Your boys won this round, but the wars just started. Isn’t it amusing that Dean takes after you so much?”  
  
“Shut up.” John spat. He knew that as long as the yellow eyed demon was focused on him, he’d leave the boys alone, and he’d leave Bobby alone.  
  
_ *  
  
For the next few days Dean let Sam mother hen him. Deep down, he enjoyed it. It was comforting in a way to watch Sam as he moved about. They were both recovering from the trauma and he was really unsure how to react to it. He knew without a shadow of a doubt that had the demon not used that spell on him he would never have instigated anything with Sam. He would have kept it bottled inside him until his dying breath. He’d have never compromised their relationship no matter how much he wanted it.  
  
Now there was no going back. It had happened, and he knew that if he tried to stop it, Sam would be devastated. He didn’t –want- it to stop. He really didn’t but a romance between two hunters? It could never work even if they didn’t have the problem of being brothers. He couldn’t end it. He’d never do that to Sam. It would just have to work out, somehow.  
  
“What are you thinking about?” Sam traced Dean’s jaw line.  
  
“Us” his brother said softly.  
  
“We’ll be fine, Dean.” Sam smiled. “I know you’ve got your doubts. I promise I’ll only act like a girl when you’re wounded and needy.”  
  
Dean looked at him suspiciously. “That would be a first.”  
  
“Shut –up-.” Sam scowled.  
  
“Make me.” Dean taunted.  
  
“Jerk”  
  
“Bitch”  
  
Sam crushed his lips to Dean’s.  


***

 

A few days later, Dean was sitting on one of Bobby’s deck chairs, attempting to enjoy music. The one thing he lamented about their friends place is the lack of a sound system. It was another stifling hot day and he was shirt off and feet up, in jeans and he was barefoot, boots sitting nearby, of course. Sam stared at the image and debated taking a picture for future bribery possibilities.  
  
“Bobby needs to invest in central air.” Dean told Sam as his brother dropped a beer in his lap.  
  
“Dean, it’s a junk yard.” Sam laughed. He clicked his bottle together with Dean’s and they sat in silence for a while. “How the damage today?”  
  
Dean smirked. “What kind? Name a muscle, it hurts.”  
  
“Yeah, I know how you feel.” Sam agreed.  
  
“Not exactly” Dean noted, “You don’t know about some of the muscles I’m talking about, yet, anyway.”  
  
“Dean!” Sam rolled his eyes. “I told you that you could, you just haven’t.”  
  
“The time isn’t right.” Dean shrugged.  
  
Sam got up from his chair and crouched by Dean. He laid a hand on his lover’s arm and just smiled at him.  
  
“What?” Dean looked up at Sam.  
  
Sam leant forward and kissed Dean spontaneously. It was the kind of sweet kiss that turns into something warm and real. There was a light aftertaste of beer and the uniqueness that was Dean. Sam straddled his brother’s lap and grinned.  
  
“What’s this for?” Dean ran his hands down Sam’s back. Not that he minded having his lap full.  
  
“Being you” Sam traced his brother’s cheek. “Keeping us together, coming to get me; always being there.”  
  
“Heh” Dean grinned, “That’s what big brothers are for, keepin’ the little ones out of trouble.”  
  
“Dean, I’m not little.”  
  
“That I’m well aware of.” Dean winked. “My ass can attest to it.”  
  
“God, do you have to be crude about everything?” Sam rolled his eyes. “Dean, I want you to know. I love you. No matter what, ok? No matter what happens, I just want you to remember that.”  
  
Dean searched Sam’s eyes. “You’re not planning on taking off are you? Because that would really piss me off if I had to go hunting you after everything.”  
  
“No.” Sam had to laugh. “But you know what Bobby said. We may be catching a breather here but shits coming, and a lot of it.  
  
“I know.” Dean nodded. He knew more than he would ever let on, now anyway, especially after what Dad told him. He stared at Sam and rubbed his thighs. “Let’s enjoy what we have.”  
  
Sam smiled wickedly at Dean and leant down to nibble his ear, then he whispered. “I want to ride you.”  
  
Dean stared, “Here? On this chair?”  
  
“Yeah” Sam writhed a bit on Dean’s lap, exciting a certain part of his brother that he knew couldn’t resist him.  
  
“Sammy. It’d collapse ten minutes in.”  
  
“Then come inside.” Sam coaxed.  
  
“I was enjoying the day, you know.” Dean decided he’d tease Sam a bit. He shifted and slid his hands to cup his lover’s buttocks. “You’re blocking the sun. I was trying to get a tan.”  
  
Sam smirked. “So that’s what it’s going to be like today, huh?”  
  
“I can’t help it that you want my body all the time. I mean, who wouldn’t?”  
  
Sam massaged Dean’s chest lightly. “Do I need to get satisfaction elsewhere?”  
  
Dean gave a warning growl. “Don’t even think about it.”  
  
Sam’s thumbs rolled over his brother’s nipples. “Wouldn’t dream of it; just want to feel your cock.”  
  
“Well, you’re not riding it, not your first time, anyway.” Dean shook his head. “And not on this chair, if you must insist on sex, we’re going inside.”  
  
“The things you’re willing to sacrifice for me, huh?”  
Dean gave Sam a plaintive look.  
  
Sam laughed and jumped up. He hooked his fingers in Dean’s jeans and yanked his brother to his feet, then pressed them both together and aligned their bodies.  
  
Dean settled his arms over Sam’s shoulders and they stood there for a few minutes just staring at each other. “You really want me to fuck you, don’t you?”  
  
“Yeah” Sam leant down and kissed Dean again. It was a lazy gentle kiss that was meant only for warmth and contact. “But I prefer to think of it as making love. We don’t fuck Dean.”  
  
Dean rolled his eyes. “You’re such a romantic. Next you’ll want candle lit dinners and teddy bears with hearts and crap.”  
  
“One of us has to be.” Sam noted, he pulled Dean against him again and ground their cocks together. He could tell his brother was more than a little aroused.  
  
“Move it.” Dean pulled away roughly and smacked Sam’s ass.  
  
*  
  
Sam had already pulled off his jeans and was working on his shirt by the time they got back to the bedroom. Dean waited in the doorway, a smirk on his lips. “What are you waiting for?” Sam eyed Dean.  
  
Dean looked innocent. “I’m enjoying the view.”  
  
Sam raised a brow as he pulled down the covers of the bed and saw what was hiding underneath it. There was a medium sized brown paper bag tied with a single pink ribbon. “Pink?” He eyed Dean suspiciously. “What’s this for?”  
  
“Can’t a guy give his own brother a present every now and then?”  
  
“Well considering how many birthdays you’ve forgotten, you owe me.” Sam picked up the bag gleefully and shook it.  
  
“For god sake, just open the bag.”  
  
“Maybe I should wait till after sex.”  
  
“Saaaam.” Dean eyed his brother.  
  
And so the bag was opened and Sam flushed. “Dean…”  
  
“What?”  
  
He pulled out a silver chain. It was one of those chain links that one would use to attach a key ring to your belt. Sam peered at it and noticed fairly small key dangling from it, with three tiny sparkling diamonds on the key head. “Dean those are real.” He gasped. “How did you afford this?”  
  
“I got my connections. Look closer.”  
  
Sam’s heart did somersault. His lips trembled. “Dean…”  
  
“Yeah well, call me sentimental sometimes.”  Actually Dean had spent several days trying to figure out what to get Sam. In the end, a girl had helped him in the jewelry store. He'd never admit it though.  
  
There was a tiny inscription on the other side of the key head. “The key to my heart – D.”  
  
It was simple, it was to the point and Sam was too overcome by emotion to say anything.  
  
“I figured this way, uh, it would be a subtle thing to carry around and should crazy shit happen, maybe it’ll remind you.” Dean shuffled from one foot to the other. “That I love you, and you know I’m not the type to give out fuzzy shit.”  
  
Sam surged to his feet and pulled Dean towards the bed. He pushed Dean on it and tugged at his jeans until they were both naked, then he climbed onto his brother and stared at him, still holding the chain in his hand. “This is beautiful; Dean, but I don’t have anything for you.”  
  
“You do have something to give me.” Dean drew his hands up Sam’s back and laced his fingers in his brother’s hair. “I’ll take it now.” He switched their positions so quickly it made Sam yelp. “I have to warn you, Sam. It’s going to hurt at first, but I promise you I’ll make it good.”  
  
“Then you’ll let me ride you?” Sam’s eyes glinted. “I’ve wanted to do that since we started this.”  
  
“Well, you’ll have to wait in line, considering there are all these women who just love to—Oof!” Dean grunted as Sam punched him.  
  
“You know I’ll always be the first in line for you, Dean.” Sam said softly. “And anyone else can just wait for eternity for all I care.” Sam wrapped the chain around and around his wrist and hooked it there for the time being. “You’re mine, Dean.”  
  
Dean grinned as Sam wrapped his legs around his waist and pressed up into him. His cock wasn’t having any trouble reacting to anything his brother did now. They kissed and he gave a low rumble as Sam tugged at his lower lip with his teeth. “Normally I’m supposed to do this with your legs over your shoulders.”  
  
“Fuck that.” Sam scoffed. “My legs are just fine where they are, keeping you in place.”  
  
“Don’t say I didn’t warn you.” Dean purred. “But I will make sure you are fully prepared.” He reached for the lube and stuck a still wrapped condom between Sam’s lips. “Hold that for me will ya?” He snickered at his brother’s expression.  
  
He doused his fingers with a generous amount of lube. “I wish I could take a video of this.” He whispered as he kissed Sam’s neck. “So I can watch you have your first real orgasm over and over again.” He took the condom. “You have no idea what this is going to feel like. I want to watch every minute.”  
  
“I trust you Dean.” Sam clutched his brother’s shoulders.  
  
“Keep your eyes open and look at me.” Dean ordered. He slipped his hand down and felt the crease of Sam’s ass. He teased his brother’s opening and watched as nervous sweat beaded on his forehead. “Relax.”  
  
Sam’s tensed at the intrusion. Dean’s worked his finger slowly into the small tight hole. “God” He swallowed.  
  
“No, just Dean.” Dean grinned and continued to worm his way in.  
  
Sam cried out. “Fuck… Dean.”  
  
“Thought you wanted to call this making love” Dean secretly enjoyed the look of desperation in his brother’s eyes. He hadn’t even begun yet. Once he was further in he moved his finger around a little and crooked it slightly. Sam was tighter than he thought.  
  
Nothing Sam had read had prepared him for this moment. It was like running out of air and being filled up with it at the same time. He nodded after a moment, “Another.” He said through clenched teeth.  
  
“Stop tensing, just relax.” Dean brushed his lips to Sam’s. “You’re scared, I was too my first time. It’s ok Sam. It’s normal.”  
  
Sam’s lips spread into a grin as he laughed suddenly. “Nothing about this relationship is normal, Dean.” Then he nearly choked and whimpered. Dean had added a second finger. “Dean…..” His breath started to come out in short little gasps.  
  
“Hold on to me.” Dean said. He started to move both fingers, working his way in until he finally found Sam’s virgin nub. He tickled it and teased it and enjoyed the stunned expression that resulted.  
  
Sam’s body was on fire, he was alive with feeling. Every part of him vibrated in the wake of Dean’s attention to a particular spot he never knew existed. He whimpered and called out his brother’s name repeatedly. He felt like he was floating above the bed.  
  
“That’s it, Sammy, let go.” Dean whispered. God Sam was gorgeous like this. His lips parted, his head thrown back, legs tight around his waist. He thought about adding a third finger but decided against it. Instead he used the two he had inside to work and continue to brush against his brother’s prostrate. Sam’s muscles were beginning to contract and clench and he knew he was close to coming. “Don’t come yet.” He fumbled with the condom. It was time. He slipped his fingers out.  
  
Sam exhaled sharply and stared at Dean. He cried out again when his entrance was pushed open again, this time not by small fingers but something much bigger than he was expecting. The pain was so intense he almost passed out from it but Dean was kissing him and soothing him.  
  
Their bellies were pressed together, his cock slid up Dean’s stomach as he felt his brother get further in. How much further? Sam panted. Stars danced in his eyes and he felt lightheaded. God it hurt more than he could ever have imagined. He fought the urge to tell Dean to stop.  
  
He was finally fully sheathed inside Sam. “Breathe, Sammy.”  
  
Sam nodded. He started to breathe again, teeth clenched. “So big” He moaned. “Hurts.”  
  
“I know.” Dean responded gently. “Get used to it. Just feel it there.” He rocked them slightly so Sam could feel his cock nudge that little nub his fingers had been playing with.  
  
“Uhhhhn…” Sam rasped. The pain was starting to ease, especially since he felt that last tremor. “Dean!”  
  
Dean took that as his cue to start to move and move he did. Once he started thrusting into Sam the passion between them escalated. Sam had forgotten the pain and started to kiss, bite and lick him. He knew Sam was going to come soon, but he meant to make this last as long as possible. He’d make this last.  
  
As for Sam, he was somewhere else. He was in a world where only he and Dean existed. It was his perfect place. He wouldn’t trade it for anything else if he had a say in the matter. This was his life, this was his destiny. He didn’t care about what Bobby said or what might happen. Dean loved him. Dean wanted him. Dean was as close as anyone could possibly get to him.  
  
He came over his brother’s stomach and held onto Dean. He was only barely coherent when he felt Dean finally release inside him. They held onto each other, Sam trembling, Dean breathing heavily.  
  
It was a perfect little protective bubble.  
  
*  
  
Two weeks later, they had healed up and were ready to go.  
  
Dean shook Bobby’s hand, “We’ll catch up with you soon. Thanks for everything.” He said as he got into the Impala.  
  
“Take it easy, Dean.” Bobby patted Dean’s shoulder. He smiled at Sam. “You take care of your big brother, ok? See that he stays out of trouble.”  
  
Sam came back around the car and gave Bobby a bear hug. “Thank you.” He whispered.  
  
Dean eyed the pair of them. “Anytime you two girls are done, come on, Sammy. We’ve got a job waiting.”  
  
Sam got back into the car and stretched out.  
  
Bobby leant down and nodded to the two. “Good luck.”  
  
He stepped away from the Impala and watched the boys drive off. With a sigh, Bobby turned and headed back inside. He worried about them but over the last month he was sure that Dean would handle Sam a lot better than John had handled him. He sifted through mail he hadn’t looked at before and frowned. There was an envelope addressed to him. He looked at the return address, but there was none. The envelope was sent a few days ago but the letter was dated several months earlier around the time of John’s death.  
  
He opened it up and his heart lumped in his throat. John’s handwriting.  
  
_Dear Bobby  
  
I know I’ve been a pain in the ass, and you probably have heard by now what’s happened. They’re my boys, Bobby. I did it for Dean. He doesn’t know, and don’t tell him. There’s so much in my life I wanted and I didn’t want it to end like this. I know where he’s going to take me and I’m counting on you.  
  
You’re the only person in this world I trust.  
_  
As he read the rest of the letter Bobby had to sit down. It had been a long time since he allowed himself the luxury of feeling.  
  
*  
  
“After this next job, Dean I want to go back to Kansas.” Sam said. “I need to see Mom’s grave.”  
  
Dean eyed Sam, “Alright.”  
  
He flipped through his cassette tapes and picked one.  
  
“So..” Sam began.  
  
“Huh?”  
  
“Now we’re back on the road, I want to know where we stand.”  
  
“Sam.” Dean rolled his eyes.  
  
“What?”  
  
“No sex in the Impala, but any other time is good.” Dean winked and the car sped up.   
  
**FIN**

 

 


End file.
